Nowadays,a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatmens instead of visiting their usual doctors. Do you think this is a positive or negative development.

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Recently,the majority of people who deal with diseases are using other ways to get better
instead
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of going to their personal
doctors
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. From my point of view , I clearly favour visiting the hospital and my own doctor rather than trying alternative pills
this
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is because a doctor will give me the best solution to prevent the disease,but the drawbacks outweigh the benefits when viewed in a broader context. The positive development of using alternative
treatment
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treatments
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such
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as yoga
because
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is because
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it is known that
this
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kind of treatment will reduce stress .
Also
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, some individuals selected to heal by eating herbs like ginger
due to
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the fact that ginger shot can make the harm of flu less.There are a lot of reasons why a great number of people choose to solve their
health
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problems by using alternative treatments .
Firstly
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,the cost of visiting the
doctors
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.
For example
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,nowadays some well-known
doctors
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started to have their own clinics and they have started to make their patients pay for everything even for better service .
Furthermore
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, most of the medicines that
doctors
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recommend to their patients are pricey and not affordable.
While
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i
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I
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believe that going to the hospital and seeing your usual
doctors
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frequently is better than trying things to prevent illness using other medicines without your doctor's consent will lead to a great deal of negative development .
Such
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as getting sicker and your
health
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will destroy without noticing .
For instance
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,
doctors
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will always check up on your
health
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and
then
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will provide you with the best treatment for your issue .
Moreover
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,sometimes eating medicines that are not the solution to your
health
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problem may cause problems to other organs in your body .To make
this
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point clear, eating a lot of panadol will lead to kidney failure. In conclusion, everything in
this
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life has a good and bad effect on us so to avoid any bad development of diseases we should visit
doctors
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to make sure that we use the best cure for our fitness

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task achievement
Consider clearly stating your position in the introduction and summary. This helps guide the reader's understanding of your viewpoint throughout the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Enhance the logical flow of ideas between sentences and paragraphs by using more linking words and phrases. This will improve coherence and cohesion in your writing.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or explanations for your points to strengthen your arguments and make them more convincing.
task achievement
You have made a clear stance on the issue, stating your preference for traditional medicine over alternative treatments.
task achievement
Some of your reasons are compelling, especially regarding the risks of alternative treatments. This could engage the reader further.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • holistic approach
  • sustainable health solutions
  • accessibility
  • cost-effectiveness
  • scientific validation
  • regulation
  • natural remedies
  • lifestyle changes
  • complement conventional treatments
  • unverified alternative methods
  • cultural importance
  • traditional treatments
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