IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowadays the way many people interact why each other has changed because of technology In what ways has technology affected the types of relation ship people make Has this become a positive or negative development?

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It goes without saying that
technology
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 has brought changes in almost all aspects of our lives including the way we communicate with each other. It has a direct impact on
people
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's
relationships
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 among their family members and friends, and I think it has both positive
or
Correct word choice
and
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nagavtive
Correct your spelling
negative
 development. On the positive side,
technology
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 has minimized the gap by improving
their
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the
show examples
relationships
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 between
people
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 who are living far away from each other by providing them with advanced mobile phones, telephones with fast
network
Fix the agreement mistake
networks
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. These technological gadgets
has
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have
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 helped them to connect with their loved ones at any time and anywhere,
therefore
Linking Words
 they can share their happiness and sorrows with them, and help them to feel secure in a difficult time. On the
nagative
Correct your spelling
negative
 side, online communication has reduced the opportunity for
people
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 to meet with each other.
For example
Linking Words
, when
people
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 go to foreign countries in search of employment and higher education, whenever they try to come back to their home nation after spending
couple
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a couple
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 of years in
outside
Correct article usage
an outside
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 country, they are often said
that
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apply
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to stay more in order to reduce their expense as their parents or other members in a family say that
its
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it's
it is
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 almost similar when they talk with them on mobile phones.
As a result
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,
this
Linking Words
technology
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 has made their
relationships
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more
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apply
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worse.
To conclude
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, I would like to reiterate that, undoubtedly,
technology
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 has brought immense benefits to our lives including the way we interact with each other, and it has both
positve
Correct your spelling
positive
or
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and
show examples
 negative effects but if we use
technology
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 wisely, I think
then
Linking Words
 definitely it will improve our
relationships
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.

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task achievement
Include a clearer thesis statement at the end of the introduction to outline the main points of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Use more linking words and phrases to improve the flow of your ideas throughout the essay.
task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples or anecdotes to strengthen the arguments you present.
task achievement
Your introduction effectively identifies the main topic and the dual nature of technology's impact on relationships.
task achievement
You demonstrate a clear understanding that technology can both help and hinder relationships, which is a nuanced perspective.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Interpersonal relationships
  • Social networking
  • Virtual communication
  • Emotional depth
  • Long-distance connectivity
  • Cultural exchange
  • Social isolation
  • Face-to-face interaction
  • Non-verbal cues
  • Cyberbullying
  • Digital etiquette
  • Social media platforms
  • Professional networking
  • Online communities
  • Marginalized groups
  • Cyber relationships
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