In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to imporse a higher tax on this kind of food. TO what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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In the contemporary era, fast

food

Use synonyms

contain

Change the verb form

contains

show examples

trans-fat and saturated fat which is not good for our

health

Use synonyms

, an individual in

few

Correct article usage

a few

show examples

countries are

distress

Wrong verb form

distressed

show examples

from

Change preposition

show examples

health

Use synonyms

issues

as a result

Linking Words

of eating more fast

food

Use synonyms

. In my notion, it is a positive development to impose a higher tax on

this

Linking Words

kind of

food

Use synonyms

. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will justify my opinion with some of the reasons. To commence with,

firstly

Linking Words

, the greater number of fast

food

Use synonyms

causes severe

health

Use synonyms

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

This

Linking Words

food

Use synonyms

include

Change the verb form

includes

show examples

more carbohydrates, sugar,

fats

Correct word choice

and fats

show examples

compare

Wrong verb form

compared

show examples

to the standard value so,

this

Linking Words

food

Use synonyms

is dangerous for individual

health

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

- Diseases like Obesity, Heart disease, Diabetes. The government would have to take action on

this

Linking Words

food

Use synonyms

as children are affected

from

Change preposition

show examples

this

Linking Words

mostly but, parents have no other option by

not

Fix the infinitive

to not

show examples

giving

Wrong verb form

give

show examples

this

Linking Words

food

Use synonyms

as they have

busy

Add an article

a busy

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schedule which

affect

Change the verb form

affects

show examples

their children by giving quick recipe

foods

Use synonyms

like pasta, burger, pizza . Moving ahead, the high tax system is good

to prevent

Change preposition

for preventing

show examples

the use of fast

food

Use synonyms

and increasing the consumption of nutritional

foods

Use synonyms

near

Correct article usage

the near

show examples

future.

Besides

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

Add a missing verb

is by

show examples

taking into consideration

Change preposition

apply

show examples

poor people as they not afford money to buy

Use synonyms

foods

Fix the agreement mistake

food

show examples

For example

Linking Words

- The rate of chips

are rises

Change the verb form

are rising

show examples

compare

Wrong verb form

compared

show examples

Add an article

the previous

show examples

year and

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

poor people have to give

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

nutritional

foods

Use synonyms

Change the article

show examples

subsidy.

As a result

Linking Words

, they

not

Change the verb form

do not

did not

show examples

suffer

Change preposition

from

show examples

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

changes.

Further

Linking Words

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

have to give awareness camps about the subsidy system to the

low wages

Correct your spelling

low-wage

show examples

individuals for better awareness. In conclusion, I reiterate that there

Verb problem

apply

show examples

an innumerable

such

Linking Words

factors supply that it is a positive development to impose a higher tax on

this

Linking Words

kind of

food

Use synonyms

which cannot be overlooked either.

nazianoor1314Sun Feb 02 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Work on creating clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to better structure your essay. This can help the reader understand the main idea of each section.

task achievement

Ensure all parts of your argument are fully developed, providing detailed explanations and examples to support your points more effectively.

language

Try to improve grammar and punctuation for greater clarity. Pay attention to sentence structure and word choice to avoid minor errors that can detract from the quality of your essay.

task achievement

Add more specific examples or data to support your claims, as this will strengthen your argument.

task achievement

You have a clear opinion on the topic, which is essential in establishing your position in the essay.

task achievement

You attempted to address both sides of the argument by discussing the impact on children and low-income individuals, showing an understanding of the broader implications.

task achievement

Your essay demonstrates an awareness of the public health issues associated with fast food consumption, which is critical for this topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

287 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

obesity
diabetes
heart disease
government intervention
taxation
healthy eating habits
public health initiatives
nutritious alternatives
affordable food options
public awareness campaigns
health problems
rise in consumption

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In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to imporse a higher tax on this kind of food. TO what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Children's education is expensive. In some countries, the government pays some or all of the costs. Do the edvantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some people think that exercise is the key to health, while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is the responsibility of schools to teach children good behavior in addition to providing formal education.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?