Today, many people spend less and less time at their home. What’s the reason for it? What are the effects of this trend on individuals and society?

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In recent times,the majority of individuals tend to spend almost all of their
life
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at
house
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the house
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and there
are
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is
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a great range of reasons that make
people
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prefer staying at
home
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rather than doing social activities .
This
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is considered a big problem because it affects human behaviour and could harm humanity. There are some reasons that make individuals choose to stay at
home
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over going outside.
First,
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social media nowadays social platforms started to become an essential thing to
people
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's lives and it takes approximately all their time .
For example
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,
people
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start to talk and communicate with others by using social apps like Snapchat rather than meeting in person to chat .
Moreover
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,bullying especially at school .To make it clear when pupils go to school and they suffer from bullying by other students
this
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will lead to favour staying at
apartment
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the apartment
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over practising social
life
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this
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is because they lose self-confidence. No social activity and spending your day at
home
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will affect the way that humans act or respond
as well as
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affect
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the
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world . Spending your
life
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at
home
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will make you an introverted person
also
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you will not know how to deal with others.
For instance
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,being outside and having some social
life
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will make the person more expert when it comes to communicating and dealing with others
this
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is because the more you get in trouble with
people
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the more mature you will get .
Furthermore
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, it will impact society in a really bad way
due to
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the fact that society will be weak and destroyed.
For example
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, if individuals select to spend their time alone at
home
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this
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will lead to less communication between the society which will make the culture unflexible. In conclusion ,everything in
this
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life
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has reason to happen and affect
people
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and the community so wasting your hour at
home
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may impact human lifestyles in unwanted ways and
also
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make the community less achievable .

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task achievement
Your introduction could be clearer. Try to state the reasons and effects directly to guide the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use linking words to better connect ideas between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points. For example, elaborate on the effects on society or give instances of how communication changes.
coherence and cohesion
Consider rephrasing sentences for clarity and grammar. Some sentences are quite long and may confuse the reader.
task achievement
You have identified relevant reasons for the trend of staying at home, highlighting social media and bullying.
coherence and cohesion
The conclusion succinctly summarises the main ideas of the essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • extended working hours
  • remote working
  • urbanization
  • economic pressures
  • digital nomad
  • social activities
  • technological advancements
  • commutes
  • recreational activities
  • engagement
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