In the last few decades there have been more and more cases of famous peoples being hounded by the press. Some people think that famous people in the media have no right privacy. To what extend do you agree?

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There is no denying the fact that the most captivating content in the

press

Use synonyms

renvolves

Correct your spelling

revolves

involves

around

celebrity

Use synonyms

and their lives.

While

Linking Words

it is

commonly

Correct article usage

a commonly

show examples

held belief that famous

people

Use synonyms

loss

Replace the word

lose

show examples

their privacy the moment they get in the media , there is

also

Linking Words

an argument that opposes it.In my opinion , I consider

although

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

well-known individuals choose

career

Fix the agreement mistake

careers

show examples

expose

Correct pronoun usage

that expose

show examples

them to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society and become

under

Change preposition

show examples

the spot ,some privacy and

limit

Fix the agreement mistake

limits

show examples

require

Wrong verb form

are required

show examples

to ensure human comfort ,

physical

Correct word choice

and physical

show examples

and mental health.

To begin

Linking Words

with ,some entertainment

journalist

Fix the agreement mistake

journalists

show examples

became a source of concern and anxiety for many

Use synonyms

celebrity

Change to a plural noun

celebrities

show examples

.A huge number of them build their career and name by stoking and following

Use synonyms

celebrity

Fix the agreement mistake

celebrities

show examples

to capture the breaking news of the day . In

other word

Change the wording

another word

other words

show examples

,since humans are curious

creater

Correct your spelling

creatures

creator

Use synonyms

celebrity

Fix the agreement mistake

celebrities

show examples

considered

Add a missing verb

are considered

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Correct article usage

the

show examples

main

interasting

Correct your spelling

interesting

material for all

people

Use synonyms

around the world .

For instance

Linking Words

Use synonyms

press

Correct article usage

the press

show examples

keeping

Wrong verb form

keeps

show examples

eye

Correct article usage

an eye

show examples

on the

artists

Change noun form

artist's

artists'

show examples

personal life,

moves

Correct word choice

and moves

show examples

catching

Wrong verb form

catches

show examples

their

scandles

Correct your spelling

scandals

candles

,and

expose

Correct subject-verb agreement

exposes

show examples

their secrets in the news for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

publicity.

Furthermore

Linking Words

Use synonyms

artist

Fix the agreement mistake

artists

show examples

Micharl

Correct your spelling

Michael

Jackson his career suffered after many cases covered by the

press

Use synonyms

leading to public backlash and financial struggles . Another point to consider ,

although

Linking Words

many

Use synonyms

artist

Change to a plural noun

artists

show examples

know the circumstances of choosing

this

Linking Words

path ,as any human they need

sense

Add an article

a sense

show examples

of privacy .

Moreover

Linking Words

press

Use synonyms

presure

Correct your spelling

pressure

leads many

Use synonyms

artist

Change to a plural noun

artists

show examples

to physical discomfort

in addition

Linking Words

to psychological effects

such

Linking Words

as loneliness ,depression and

another mental illnesses

Replace the adjective

another mental illness

other mental illnesses

show examples

.It is possible to say,

the

Correct word choice

that the

show examples

media plays a major role in shaping

aritist's

Correct your spelling

artist's

lives with significant influences on their professional and personal life . In conclusion , despite

people

Use synonyms

having different

point

Fix the agreement mistake

points

show examples

of view about

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

famous

Use synonyms

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

prievate

Correct your spelling

private

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

and the

Use synonyms

press

Change noun form

press's

show examples

role in it , I believe constant media attention puts

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

Use synonyms

artist

Fix the agreement mistake

artists

show examples

under pressure which deeply

effects

Correct your spelling

affects

show examples

their lives .The right to have some space is necessary ,especially with

today

Change noun form

today's

show examples

technology .

youmnamaher91Mon Feb 03 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence to help guide the reader through your ideas.

task achievement

Improve grammatical accuracy, especially with verb forms and pluralization, to enhance clarity.

coherence and cohesion

Consider adding more varied vocabulary and complex sentence structures to elevate your writing.

task achievement

You present a balanced view of the topic, acknowledging both sides of the argument.

coherence and cohesion

Your examples are relevant and relate well to your arguments, which strengthens your points.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
49
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

309 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

celebrity scrutiny
public interest
media scrutiny
free press
mental health issues
intrusive media behavior
ethical considerations
digital age
social media proliferation
public-private boundary
consent to scrutiny
legal protections

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In the last few decades there have been more and more cases of famous peoples being hounded by the press. Some people think that famous people in the media have no right privacy. To what extend do you agree?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

People nowadays tend to have children later in life. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Today many people do not know their neighbours in large cities. What problems does this cause? What can be done about this?

In many country, people have health problems because they choose to live in an unhealthy way. Why do you think that people choose to live in an unhealthy way. What can be done about this problem.

You participated in a public event organized at a local park. Write a letter to the event organizer. In your letter tell them some feedback about the event; explain what you particularly enjoyed; give some suggestions for improvement.