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Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Long distance flight consumes the amount of fuel that a car uses for many years and pollutes the air. Some people think tgat we should discourage non-essential flights, such as tourists travel , rather than limit the use.

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Introduction
Nowadays, the number of
long distance
Add a hyphen
long-distance
show examples
flights
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 increasing.
This
Linking Words
 causes
to
Correct pronoun usage
them to
show examples
 use more
fuels
Fix the agreement mistake
fuel
show examples
 than a car uses. Amount of
people
Use synonyms
 claim that
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 should ban unnecessary
flights
Use synonyms
 ,
for instance
Linking Words
, planned
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
travel
Use synonyms
 , or should put
limition
Correct your spelling
limitations
 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
use. I totally disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement, because it is
restriction
Add an article
a restriction
the restriction
show examples
 of freedom and
reduce
Correct subject-verb agreement
reduces
show examples
 to
profit
Add an article
a profit
the profit
show examples
 of
state
Correct article usage
the state
show examples
 which is
cing
Correct your spelling
coming
 through tourism.
Body paragraph 1
First of all , every
Use synonyms
people
Fix the agreement mistake
person
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 opportunities in many ways. All
people
Use synonyms
make
Verb problem
apply
show examples
dream about
fly to
Wrong verb form
flying
show examples
 abroad. Abridgiment
flights
Use synonyms
 which are aimed at
travel
Use synonyms
 can put
limition
Correct your spelling
limitation
limitations
 on
freedom
Correct article usage
the freedom
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
.
People
Use synonyms
 want to fly
other
Change preposition
to other
show examples
 countries
for learning
Change preposition
to learn
show examples
Linking Words
Change preposition
about this
show examples
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 countries's
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
. If
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
ban
Correct subject-verb agreement
bans
show examples
 tourism, it will be have prevented
Correct pronoun usage
them to
show examples
to come
Change preposition
from coming
show examples
 true
their
Change preposition
to their
show examples
 dreams.
Body paragraph 2
Second
Add an article
The second
show examples
 reason is that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
state
Add an article
the state
show examples
 is getting
bug
Correct your spelling
a big
show examples
propation
Correct your spelling
proportion
probation
 of profit from tourism. Some countries are developing through
this
Linking Words
 money.
For instance
Linking Words
, Saudi Arabia,
French
Replace the word
France
show examples
, Italy, Dubai and others.
According to
Linking Words
satatics
Correct your spelling
statistics
statics
, Saudi Arabia
earn
Change the verb form
earns
show examples
 money around 12 billion dollars from only hajj in pear year. If
people
Use synonyms
 eliminate
travel
Use synonyms
 to
other country
Change the wording
another country
other countries
show examples
, it will
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
 to
finance
Wrong verb form
finances
show examples
 of
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
.
Conclusion
To sum up
Linking Words
 everything,
flights
Use synonyms
 lead to damage
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
air
Correct article usage
the air
show examples
. Some
people
Use synonyms
 claim that we should reduce
flights
Use synonyms
 in
travel
Use synonyms
. As , it is
unjustice
Correct your spelling
injustice
show examples
 for
people
Use synonyms
, who have made dream since they were
yound
Correct your spelling
young
.

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grammar
Ensure proper sentence structure and grammar, as some sentences in your essay contain grammatical errors that may confuse the reader.
development
Develop your ideas further by providing more specific examples or evidence to support your claims.
cohesion
Work on transitioning between ideas more smoothly to improve the overall flow of your essay.
task achievement
Your essay presents a clear opinion against limiting non-essential flights, which is essential for a strong task response.
task achievement
You have attempted to make a logical argument for individual freedom and the economic benefits of tourism.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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