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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a European country between 1979 and 2004 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main featues, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a European country between 1979 and 2004 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main featues, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The given line graph illustrates how much fish and meat was consumed in
european
Change the capitalization
European
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country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
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 over a period of 25 years from 1979 to 2004. Units are measured in grams per person per week.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can clearly be seen that the
consumption
Use synonyms
 of all food
decrease
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
 throughout the given period, with the exception of chicken.
Moreover
Linking Words
, Chicken was the most consumed food
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period. In terms of the highest level of food
consumption
Use synonyms
at the end
Linking Words
, Chicken stood at just below 150 in 1979. In the following 10 years, it rose gradually and converged with beef at 200 in 1989.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the amount experienced a slight increase and reached a peak of 250 in the final year.
The regarding
Correct article usage
Regarding
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 the other 2 foods with the lower level, Beef and Lamb started at around 210 and exactly 150 respectively. The
consumption
Use synonyms
 of beef witnessed a slight decrease by 30 between 1979 and 1984, it
then
Linking Words
 increased
drmatically
Correct your spelling
dramatically
 before dropping to 120 in 2004.
Whereas
Linking Words
 the
consumption
Use synonyms
 of lamb declined drastically by around 30 between 1984 and 1989, it
then
Linking Words
 saw a slight growth before reaching
lowest
Correct pronoun usage
its lowest
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 point at about 70
at the end
Linking Words
. In regard to Fish, the amount started at around 60 at the start,
then
Linking Words
 remained relatively steady
Change preposition
for a
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a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 whole of the
years
Fix the agreement mistake
year
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.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words consumption with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 3 times.
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