IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You would like to invite your friend from abroad to a public event in your country. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter - describe the public event - explain why you think he/she would like the event - tell him/her about the other activities you can do

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Dear Tye, I hope you are doing well, I was really excited that you are coming for the holiday vacation to our hometown for two weeks. After I have
recieved
Correct your spelling
received
this
Linking Words
 information , I have started planning for our outing. Fortunately, Our childhood favourite music band
events
Fix the agreement mistake
event
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 is going to
held
Add a missing verb
be held
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at
Change preposition
in
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 our locality on December 12th.
Its
Replace the word
It's
It is
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 a public event conducted
my
Correct your spelling
by
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 the government for
the
Correct article usage
a
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 social cause.
However
Linking Words
, I have purchased a ticket for us to enjoy the overwhelming
musics
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music
kinds of music
pieces of music
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.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, I will plan
an
Change the article
a
show examples
one day
Add a hyphen
one-day
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 trip to Ooty in
Correct article usage
the motor
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motor cycle
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motorcycle
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. it would
more
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be more
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thrill
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thrilling
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 and memorable.
Inaddition
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In addition
,
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apply
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 will plan some activities
Such
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 as Camping
and
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apply
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trekking and cliff sightseeing. As I
said
Verb problem
apply
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said earlier, the camping part will be more
thrill
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thrilling
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 for us .
Beacause
Correct your spelling
Because
 we are going to
do
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go
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 camping in the middle of the Tea plantation with the weather of 5 degrees Celsius. So bring your camping shoes and a jacket
for
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to
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 make you warm in Ooty. I am waiting to see you soon and spend some quality time with you. Your's Faithful, RK

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coherence and cohesion
Consider organizing your letter into clearer paragraphs. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea, which will make your letter easier to follow.
task achievement
Ensure that you proofread for small spelling and grammatical errors to enhance the clarity of your writing.
task achievement
You have effectively described the public event and provided reasons why your friend would be interested in it, which is great for task achievement.
task achievement
The enthusiasm in your tone conveys a warm invitation, which is inviting and engaging for your friend.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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