It is a good thing for the senior managers to have better salaries than other workers in a company or organization? To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Usually

Add a comma

Usually,

show examples

we observe

the

Correct your spelling

that

show examples

companies are paying higher salaries to senior

management

Use synonyms

than other staff which

always

Add a missing verb

is always

show examples

a debatable topic. I am completely in favour of

this

Linking Words

and

further

Linking Words

elucidate the reason behind my opinion.

Firstly

Linking Words

, Senior Managers are

most

Correct article usage

the most

show examples

qualified and experienced people in the organizations. They attained

there

Replace the word

their

show examples

position by qualifying

higher

Change preposition

for higher

show examples

educations

Fix the agreement mistake

education

show examples

which is completed after studies and research work. Few positions

also

Linking Words

require certain certifications which will be an additional effort.

For example

Linking Words

, every sales manager

need

Correct subject-verb agreement

needs

show examples

Change the article

show examples

MBA in sales and

Microsoft

Correct article usage

a Microsoft

show examples

office

Capitalize word

Office

show examples

qualification as a minimum.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, Experience plays a vital role

along with

Linking Words

education and knowledge. They reached

Change preposition

apply

show examples

this

Linking Words

designation after serving various roles in

thier

Correct your spelling

their

career

Fix the agreement mistake

careers

show examples

where they learned every aspect of

management

Use synonyms

. Prolonged exposure to various fields like manufacturing, Sales or finance

provide

Change the verb form

provides

show examples

them better

decision making

Add a hyphen

decision-making

show examples

capability.

Secondly

Linking Words

, Higher

management

Use synonyms

have

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

plays multi-skilling tasks and

bear

Correct subject-verb agreement

bears

show examples

the pressure from executive

management

Use synonyms

and customers to run the

bussiness sucessfully

Correct your spelling

business successfully

. Performing an individual work task is much easier than

supervise

Wrong verb form

supervising

show examples

someone or

make

Wrong verb form

making

show examples

sure

Add an article

the sure

a sure

show examples

same

Correct article usage

the same

show examples

task

to be get

Change the verb form

show examples

executed by workers. They have to

make sure

Verb problem

ensure

show examples

smooth productivity with desired quality which will

be required

Wrong verb form

require

show examples

manpower

mangement

Correct your spelling

management

and planning. There

are

Change the verb form

show examples

lot

Change the article

a lot

show examples

of risks, stress and pressure associated with

workplace

Add an article

the workplace

show examples

which they have to face and proactively plan to avoid hurdles in

workplace

Correct article usage

the workplace

show examples

. They are

also

Linking Words

responsible

Change preposition

for

show examples

compliance with safety and

health related

Add a hyphen

health-related

show examples

issues

also

Linking Words

. In order

to conclude

Linking Words

my opinion, I believe that Senior managers

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

deserve

comparitively

Correct your spelling

comparatively

more payouts than ordinary ones as they are highly educated and

Add a hyphen

well-diversified

show examples

well diversified

Add a hyphen

well-diversified

show examples

Correct your spelling

personnel

personel

Correct your spelling

personnel

in the factory

which

Correct pronoun usage

who

show examples

manage all the activities to get the desired positive output

bhinder.bhattalFri Feb 07 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Grammar/Sentence Structure

Make sure to proofread for grammatical errors; for instance, 'there' should be 'their' in the context used. Also, watch for sentence clarity; some sentences could be simplified for better understanding.

Content

Include more specific examples to support your points, as real-life examples can make your argument more convincing, especially in the context of senior management tasks and responsibilities.

Conclusion

Strengthen the conclusion by reiterating the main points discussed in the essay for a more impactful closing statement.

Thesis Statement

You provided a clear stance at the beginning of the essay, which is essential for task response.

Organization

Your essay structure is logical, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
40
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

278 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

competitive edge
remuneration
corporate hierarchy
job performance
executive compensation
organizational growth
responsibility load
workplace morale
income disparity
budget constraints

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
Many young people do not spend their holidays and weekends doing outdoor activities like hiking and climbing in natural environments. Why is this the case? How can they be encouraged to go out?
Nowadays, people are interested in technical devices and artificial things instead of traditional activities.Myriad of youngsters is not interested in celebrating holidays and outdoor activities in habitat. This essay will be explained the reason and will be given the possible solution to this.
4.5
band
You would like to reduce your working hours in order to study part time. Write a letter to your boss. In your letter • explain why you want to reduce your working hours • say which hours you would like to work • describe how your part-time studies would benefit your employer
I am writing to inform you I would like reduce my working hours,
6.5
band
Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each orther. Others argue that people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
This essay discusses two different perspectives on the dependency of people in the modern world which is influenced by modern technologies and innovation. The writer tries to present both views and elaborate based on a personal point of view.
7
band
‏Nowadays environmental problems are too big to be managed by individual persons or individual countries. In other words, it is an international problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In recent times environmental issues have increased. It is a highly debatable issue whether individuals can control this problem, or whether it is an international issue. I agree that everyone contributes to saving the environment.This essay will outline the benefits and effects of managing environmental problems by individuals.
5.5
band
"Fatherhood ought to be emphasized as much as motherhood. The idea that women are solely responsible for deciding whether or not to have babies leads on to the idea that they are also responsible for bringing the children up." To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In the contemporary world, it is a controversial argument that the father's role is as important as the mother's in the children’s lives from the initial steps. I agree with this extent so I will discuss its reasons in the essay.

It is a good thing for the senior managers to have better salaries than other workers in a company or organization? To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Many young people do not spend their holidays and weekends doing outdoor activities like hiking and climbing in natural environments. Why is this the case? How can they be encouraged to go out?

You would like to reduce your working hours in order to study part time. Write a letter to your boss. In your letter • explain why you want to reduce your working hours • say which hours you would like to work • describe how your part-time studies would benefit your employer

Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each orther. Others argue that people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

‏Nowadays environmental problems are too big to be managed by individual persons or individual countries. In other words, it is an international problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

"Fatherhood ought to be emphasized as much as motherhood. The idea that women are solely responsible for deciding whether or not to have babies leads on to the idea that they are also responsible for bringing the children up." To what extent do you agree or disagree?