Students should pay full cost for their own study, because university education benefit individuals rather than society. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

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Some
people
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believe that scholars should fund their own
education
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as it is only beneficial for them rather than for
society
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. Others believe that
education
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costs should be subsidized as it
also
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brings benefits to
society
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. In
this
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essay
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essay,
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I will argue that
education
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funds should not be fully charged to the scholar but
also
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need to be subsidized by other parties especially the government as it has cumulative impacts
to
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on
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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society
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.  Studies showed that educated
people
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are more likely to have better living standards and eventually will create a better
society
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.
This
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is because they are more knowledgeable
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hence
Correct word choice
and hence
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more critical of the way they live their
life
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.
For example
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, educated
people
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are more likely to know the importance of saving energy and resources
hence
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it will impact
on
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apply
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the way they use power in daily
life
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and their chances to live a green
life
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resulting in a better earth and better
society
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.
Additionally
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, knowledgeable scholars tend to have better
problem solving
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problem-solving
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skills which will lead to their ability to find solutions and opportunities.
For example
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,
people
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who study public
policy
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will have the ability to create a holistic public
policy
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that is
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already considering many parties. In short, a good
policy
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will lead to better governance and a better
life
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. In conclusion, I believe that
education
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should not be fully charged to the scholar as the impacts of their
education
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is
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are
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not only for themselves but
also
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beneficial to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society
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such
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as having a better living standard and better public
policy
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task achievement
Consider providing a clearer thesis statement in the introduction to specify your main argument more directly.
task achievement
Expand on your examples to further illustrate how education benefits society specifically and in various sectors.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words and phrases more effectively to enhance the flow of the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph clearly supports the main argument and has a clear topic sentence.
task achievement
You presented a balanced view by acknowledging both perspectives before stating your position.
task achievement
Your examples are relevant and support your arguments well, showing the link between individual education and societal benefits.
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