Many researchers believe that we can now study the behavior of children to see if they will grow up to be criminals, while others disagree. To what extent do you think crime is determined by genetics? Is it possible to stop children from growing up to be criminals?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The rise in mobile
phone
Use synonyms
usage in recent years has significantly altered the way we live, interact, and conduct business.
While
Linking Words
mobile
phones
Use synonyms
have undeniably improved many aspects of our lives, they have
also
Linking Words
contributed to social and health-related problems.
However
Linking Words
, despite these challenges, the benefits of mobile
phone
Use synonyms
use
Use synonyms
often outweigh the drawbacks when managed properly. One major advantage of mobile
phones
Use synonyms
is their positive impact on education, business, and daily life. With easy access to online lessons, PDFs, and various resources, mobile
phones
Use synonyms
have made learning more accessible than ever before.
For instance
Linking Words
, compared to the 1990s, people in 2024 can learn new languages effortlessly through language apps and online courses.
This
Linking Words
technology allows for flexible learning, making education more efficient and convenient.
As a result
Linking Words
, mobile
phones
Use synonyms
play a crucial role in expanding educational opportunities and enhancing personal development.
However
Linking Words
, excessive mobile
phone
Use synonyms
use
Use synonyms
can lead to physical inactivity and health issues. One effective solution is incorporating sports,
such
Linking Words
as football, into daily routines. Football,
for example
Linking Words
, helps individuals stay fit and healthy despite the time spent on mobile
phones
Use synonyms
. Professional football players, even with their extensive mobile
phone
Use synonyms
use
Use synonyms
for training and communication, maintain excellent physical health
due to
Linking Words
regular exercise and balanced lifestyles.
This
Linking Words
highlights how physical activity can counteract the negative effects of screen time. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
mobile
phone
Use synonyms
use
Use synonyms
has its drawbacks,
such
Linking Words
as potential health problems, these issues can be managed through physical activity. The advantages,
such
Linking Words
as enhanced education and business opportunities, far outweigh the disadvantages when individuals adopt a balanced lifestyle.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Try to include more examples that directly relate to the impact of mobile phones on social and health-related issues to strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Use more linking phrases or cohesive devices to enhance the overall flow of the essay.
task achievement
The essay presents clear and comprehensive ideas about both the advantages and disadvantages of mobile phones.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is strong, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • genetic predispositions
  • nature versus nurture
  • aggression
  • impulsivity
  • socio-economic status
  • coping mechanism
  • intervention programs
  • mental health support
  • community engagement
  • delinquency
  • early childhood education
  • emotional regulation
  • predictive policing
  • ethical concerns
  • discrimination
What to do next:
Look at other essays: