IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

The pictures show information about avarage income and spending on food and clothes by an average family in a city UK.

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A glance at the chart and table reveals data about
average
Correct article usage
the average
show examples
 income and
expenditure
Use synonyms
 on clothes and food by a normal family in
specific
Add an article
a specific
show examples
 city for 3 years in the UK. The initial impression from the table is that even though the average income saw a decline, there was
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 increase in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
expenditure
Use synonyms
. First of all, in 2010 spending money
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 fruit and vegetables
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 the highest
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 26%,
then
Linking Words
, it saw a negligible increase to 30%.
Likewise
Linking Words
, the proportion of dairy products climbed from 12% to 16% in 2013. Meanwhile, there was a considerable downward trend in the percentage of meat and fish from 29% to 23% in 2013.
Similarly
Linking Words
, clothes experienced a reduction in the figure, dropping from 15% to 13% in 2010. It is interesting to note that, the rate of other food remained stable at 18% throughout the period, indicating that the only one
expenditure
Use synonyms
 that did not feel
upward
Correct article usage
an upward
show examples
 and downward trend. Looking at the details, as regards average income, it started from 29000 in 2010
then
Linking Words
 there was a marked fall to 25000,
whereas
Linking Words
 the
expenditure
Use synonyms
 on food and clothes climbed from 14000 to 15000 in 2013

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task achievement
Provide a clearer overview that summarizes the trends in income and expenditure more succinctly in the introduction.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use the correct form of words (e.g., 'an increase' instead of 'a increase').
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that all figures are clearly introduced and explained within the context of the trends being discussed. This helps with clarity.
task achievement
You have presented relevant data and highlighted key trends, which is essential for this type of task.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is logically structured, with clear divisions of points discussed throughout the response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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