In some countries, children under 16 years old are not allowed by law to leave school and get full-time work. Is this a good or bad thing? Discuss your opinion.

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It is legal to forbid students from leaving school and have a full-time occupation until they become 16, in several nations.
While
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it comes with some advantages, it may have demerits simultaneously. In my opinion, children should study to get a diploma to have the least knowledge. When it comes to study and work, a couple of laws are imposed to protect the young in many countries.
For example
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, children are allowed to work part-time without insurance before passing military service (under 18 years) in Iran. So, it may ensure the minimum literacy among people.
Moreover
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, it prepares adolescents to enter university and pursue their dreams in a scientific atmosphere.
In addition
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to that, few families abuse children to earn money.
For instance
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, there are approximately 2 million child workers in Tehran, Iran. These workers usually belong to the addicted parents.
On the other hand
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, when teenagers have the opportunity to work at younger ages, it has specific benefits. First of all, some parents are disabled and they need to be supported by other people.
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, it is beneficial to have a chance to get a job and cover family expenses.
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, a portion of the student community may born with special skills rather than studying like music, singing, and trading.
As a result
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, they should be permitted to select the right way as soon as possible. When all is said and done, I believe that working under 16 can result in a lack of literacy in society. So, it is an effective law to protect adolescents and societal science. In conclusion,
although
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the limitations of age to enter the workplace in some countries may have several deficiencies, it has significant benefits for people themselves and nations. I am of the opinion that these sorts of legislations can support the scientific fields of community in the future.

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task achievement
Develop your ideas further with more examples and explanations, especially in the body paragraphs.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your paragraphs have clear topic sentences to improve the logical flow of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Clarify some of your statements to enhance understanding. For example, the term 'military service' in connection to working age might need further explanation.
task achievement
You have made a clear stance regarding the topic and maintained it throughout the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points, reinforcing your viewpoint.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • mandatory
  • exploitation
  • educational attainment
  • critical thinking
  • workforce
  • professional development
  • career prospects
  • low-wage work
  • innovative
  • global economy
  • environments that prioritize health
  • dropout rates
  • specialized training
  • personal development
  • advancement opportunities
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