IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1.5

Some people believe that it is better to live in the countryside, while others think that city life is more beneficial. Discuss both views and give your own opinion."

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As
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society continues to
growing
Change the form of the verb
grow
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, the debate between people who advocate living in cities and countryside advocators
had been
Wrong verb form
has
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occured
Correct your spelling
occurred
 in recent years.
Althought
Correct your spelling
Although
 every citizen
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 a
differents
Correct your spelling
different
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 life vision and priority in my opinion city life has more opportunities and
advanteges
Correct your spelling
advantages
 when
it
Correct pronoun usage
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compared with living in rural regions.
This
Linking Words
 essay will justify why living in more developed and crowded places and give relevant examples to
justofy
Correct your spelling
justify
 it.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, the major reason
for
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why living in a city is better than living in a rural region is the opportunities that you will able to get in city life. From
the
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fundemantal
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fundamental
 needs
to
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apply
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such
Linking Words
 as health to
entertainment
Correct article usage
the entertainment
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 industry you can able to find any opportunities including both basic needs and luxury events. To better illustrate

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task achievement
Your introduction effectively outlines your opinion, but consider refining your thesis statement for clarity. Additionally, ensure that you identify both sides of the argument in the introduction.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to check your spelling and grammar throughout your essay. Mistakes like 'Althought' and 'advanteges' detract from the overall quality.
task achievement
In your supporting paragraphs, while you discuss the opportunities in cities, try to balance it by also discussing some benefits of countryside living before concluding with your opinion. This will strengthen your argument and show a more comprehensive understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Your essay presents a clear opinion on the topic, which is essential for the task.
coherence and cohesion
You have made a good attempt at structuring the essay, with a clear introduction and body paragraphs.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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