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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Below is a map of the city of Brandfield. City planners have decided to build a new shopping mall for the area, and two sites, S1 and S2 have been proposed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Below is a map of the city of Brandfield. City planners have decided to build a new shopping mall for the area, and two sites, S1 and S2 have been proposed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The map illustrates two proposed locations for a new supermarket in the
city
Use synonyms
 of Brandfield.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident that neither
location
Use synonyms
 is ideal for the
city
Use synonyms
’s needs.
However
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, for
customers
Use synonyms
 in Brandfield, the
location
Use synonyms
 between the residential area and the
city
Use synonyms
 centre (S1) would likely offer more advantages.
To begin
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 with, the first potential
location
Use synonyms
, S1, is located just outside the
city
Use synonyms
, off a road connecting the northeast and southeast regions.
This
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 site has the potential to accommodate a large parking area and is close to both a golf course and a park. It would be easily accessible for
customers
Use synonyms
 from the residential area and
city
Use synonyms
 centre who can travel by car.
Additionally
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, S1 is near the railway line linking the northwest and southeast parts of the
city
Use synonyms
, allowing potential
customers
Use synonyms
 from these areas to travel by train.
In contrast
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, the second proposed
location
Use synonyms
, S2, is situated in the countryside in the southeast.
While
Linking Words
 theoretically accessible by both road and rail from surrounding towns,
this
Linking Words
location
Use synonyms
 is farther from the
city
Use synonyms
 centre and housing areas. Its proximity to parks and industrial areas may not make it as convenient for
customers
Use synonyms
 who primarily rely on easy access to the
city
Use synonyms
center
Change the spelling
centre
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 and surrounding residential neighbourhoods.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words city, location, customers with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • proximity
  • residential area
  • industrial zone
  • city center
  • main road
  • benefits
  • convenience
  • traffic congestion
  • accessibility
  • workers
  • compare
  • differences
  • pros and cons
  • suitable
  • analysis
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