IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Natural resources such as oil, forests, and freshwater are being consumed at an alarming rate. What problem does this cause? How can we solve these problems?

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It is undeniable the fact that natural assets are a controversial matter to be discussed.
While
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 it is a commonly held belief that the consumption of these resources
such
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 as oil, forests, and freshwater is at an alarming rate.
This
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 essay will analyse both of the factors that contribute to
this
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 issue and some measures that could address
this
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 adverse phenomenon.
To begin
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 with, the lack of strict regulations
as well as
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 detrimental behaviours to the environment left a substantial impact
to
Change preposition
on
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 these valuable assets. To elaborate, human destructive behaviours
such
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 as industrialization, mining, and agriculture
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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are essential for economic development but can have detrimental environmental consequences.
For example
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, the fuel
industry
Use synonyms
 was the main cause of global climate change because it damaged the ozone layer.
Therefore
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, the weather has gone through unpredictable heat waves which affected the ecosystem significantly. In terms of the suggested measures, regulating the
industry
Use synonyms
 sector with
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
strict policies and procedures will be effective in limiting these harmful acts. It is
also
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 possible to say that conducting inspection rounds by a specialist environmental committee in order to ensure implementation of these regulations.
For instance
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, mandatory participation in global agreements that aim to preserve natural resources by all institutions that work in the
industry
Use synonyms
 sector. In conclusion, there are several causes that led to
this
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 severe natural problem;
however
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, I firmly recommend that
besides
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 regulating the
industry
Use synonyms
 sector, all world nations should be concerned about allocating a huge budget and encouraging researchers to explore other alternatives in case these natural assets have been consumed.

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task achievement
Expand your introduction to include a clear thesis statement that summarizes your main points.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that indicates the main idea of the paragraph.
task achievement
Support your arguments with more specific examples or data to strengthen your points.
coherence and cohesion
Vary your sentence structure to enhance the flow and readability of the essay.
task achievement
The identification of the causes and solutions shows a good understanding of the issue.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is organized with clear paragraphs, making it easy to follow the writer's arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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