Nowadays, the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development?

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Modern advancements in technology
has
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have
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significantly changed the methods in which
people
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communicate with each other.
Although
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it means that more ways have developed for communication, there are
less
Correct quantifier usage
fewer
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deeper
relationships
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because of the insecurities.
This
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is a negative
development
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because it leads to mental issues for the individuals if they have a small number of close
friends
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. Social media has played a big role in making
relationships
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nowadays. We have numerous amount of applications in which we can connect with anyone around the globe. With
this
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development
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, it is widely observed that everyone is connecting less to
people
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around them but more interested in having
friends
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on these applications. Even though we have a big list of '
friends
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' in our accounts, we still have
less
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fewer
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people
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who we can actually connect with in case of
ups
Correct article usage
the ups
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and downs of our lives.
People
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are having more insecurities because of the social image their
friends
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have created.
This
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leads to more jealousy and less intimate relations, which is a cause of depression and anxiety.
For instance
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,
the
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apply
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suicidal rates have increased
since
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in
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past
Correct article usage
the past
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few years because teenagers feel lonely and cannot ask for help even when they usually have a big group of
friends
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.
Thus
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, it is clearly a negative
development
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because these advancements have led to mental issues. In conclusion, with the social media advancements, making
relationships
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are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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usually just one tap away, but when it comes to creating healthy
relationships
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, it is a negative
development
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because it leads to
surface level
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surface-level
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friendships, and
also
Linking Words
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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not very beneficial to mental
wellbeing
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well-being
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.

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task achievement
Consider providing a more balanced view by acknowledging any potential positive aspects of technology in relationships, even if you ultimately argue for the negative. This would strengthen your position and make your response more comprehensive.
coherence and cohesion
Try to include more varied sentence structures and transition phrases to improve the flow of your writing. This will enhance coherence and make your arguments clearer.
coherence and cohesion
Be careful with word choice; for instance, instead of 'less deeper relationships,' use 'shallower relationships' for clearer expression.
task achievement
The essay addresses both the changes in relationships due to technology and presents a clear opinion on it being a negative development.
task achievement
The use of a relevant example regarding the increase in suicidal rates adds weight to your argument and aligns with the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • technology
  • interact
  • relationships
  • connectivity
  • communication
  • online
  • face-to-face
  • friendships
  • romantic relationships
  • family dynamics
  • positive
  • negative
  • development
  • effects
  • formation
  • ease
  • impacts
  • communities
  • connect
  • interaction
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