IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

you need to take leave from your work of over a month for personal reasons. write a letter to your boss. in your letter: - explain the reasons for the leave and length of leave you need, - explain how you will keep up to date while you are away, - suggest how your work could be covered while you are away

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Dear Mr. Franklin, I hope
this
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 letter finds you well. I am writing to kindly ask for
a
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permission to take my annual leave as soon as possible
due to
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 personal circumstances. To give you more details, my younger sister went to the hospital
last
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 Friday, because of
work
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a work
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 accident that happened to her. She had been cleaning windows at the company's site
,
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 when all of a sudden she had
fell
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fallen
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 down the stairs. Unfortunately,
this
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 resulted in breaking her leg.
Therefore
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, I would like to take
a
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time off, preferably a month and a half to provide care for my sister. I will talk to my colleague, Jan
,
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 if he can send me updates on the ongoing project that we oversee together. I will
also
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 bring my work laptop with me so I can log in to check on the most urgent cases. I would kindly suggest that my most demanding tasks might be split
amongst
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among
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 senior colleagues.
On the other hand
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, tasks which are not considered
as
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urgent might be left for handling upon my return. I would greatly
appeciate
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appreciate
 your prompt attention to my request and hope to hear from you soon. Yours sincerely, Marnie Collins

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coherence and cohesion
Consider adding a clear opening statement to introduce the purpose of your letter more directly.
task achievement
Ensure consistent verb tenses. For instance, 'had fell' should be corrected to 'had fallen'.
suitable writing tone
Your tone is polite and appropriate for a formal request.
complete response
You've clearly stated the reason for your leave and how you intend to manage your responsibilities during your absence.
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