Some people believe that art, such as painting and music, does not improve people’s lives, so the government should not spend money on it. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experiences.

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Artists are people who paint or play instruments and need the

government

Use synonyms

to encourage their talents. People differ in their opinion on

this

Linking Words

says, some of them

agree

Add the preposition

agree on

agree to

agree with

show examples

the support from the

government

Use synonyms

to those talented and some of them disagree and believe that

this

Linking Words

is not necessarily for

well-being

Correct article usage

the well-being

show examples

life

Change preposition

of life

show examples

. In my view, I believe that painting and

music

Use synonyms

have enormous effects on our lives to be healthier.

Capitalize word

show examples

this

Linking Words

essay we will discuss both views with supportive examples and conclude with my opinion. On the one hand, teenager believes that painting and

music

Use synonyms

are great for enhancing their mode and

life's

Change the noun form

lives

life

show examples

Moreover

Linking Words

, they see it as a chance to have a job or be

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

popular

Change preposition

show examples

social media because it is

easily

Change the word

easy

show examples

to have followers with the same interests. We saw in real life

this

Linking Words

type of

activities

Fix the agreement mistake

activity

show examples

for example

Linking Words

: artists, actors, musicians and singers become more popular, and their followers enjoy what they post.

Finally

Linking Words

, the

government

Use synonyms

support them by preparing for them a gallery or stage to perform.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, elderly people disagree with that view and believe it is not essential to have them or their presence and absence the same.it is wasting of resources they saw these activities are time wasters. I believe that

music

Use synonyms

and painting play a vital role in human lives enhance the quality of our lives by listening to some

music

Use synonyms

or using it as a therapist

such

Linking Words

as in yoga. We can see that the

government

Use synonyms

support them and encourages these activities.

To conclude

Linking Words

, we believe that

music

Use synonyms

and painting are very important to humans and that’s why the

government

Use synonyms

spend a lot to keep these upgrades.

alyah.alshehriSun Feb 16 2025

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task achievement

Clarify your opinion in the introduction more explicitly and ensure each paragraph clearly supports it.

coherence and cohesion

Use more linking phrases and transition words to improve flow and readability.

task achievement

You provided an explanation of both views on the topic, which is a good approach.

task achievement

Your essay includes personal opinions and some relevant examples, demonstrating your engagement with the topic.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

281 words

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Some people believe that art, such as painting and music, does not improve people’s lives, so the government should not spend money on it. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experiences.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Studying with a group of students in a classroom is more beneficial than learning online at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many people today change their career paths multiple times throughout their lives. Is this a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples.

In many countries today insufficient respect is shown to older people. What do you think may be the reasons for this? What problems might this cause in society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.