In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think of the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes?

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The tendency of

offense

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offence

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is becoming a major issue in many countries, poverty and lack of education are leading to

this

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, which can be resolved after taking some measures by governments and individuals,

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

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will be discussed in the following paragraphs. The first and foremost reason behind crime is deprivation. the undesirable circumstances make people choose the wrong methods for their earnings

such

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as theft, to

fulfill

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fulfil

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their basic needs like bread and butter, make them chase valuable goods to become affluent person

for example

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chain snatching.

Secondly

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, it is not easy to acquire a well-paid job for uneducated youngsters, in

this

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case, their first option is always to obtain money from other resources which are not limited to only drug tariffing, and money laundry, but

also

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include bank robberies. These faults make them "The Most Wanted" criminals. The international web series "Money Heist" is based on these kinds of people and actions and reveals how unwanted circumstances can pressure someone to commit big mistakes. In order to diminish the rate of crime both higher authorities and individuals need to take appropriate actions.

For example

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as well as

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, by providing

labor

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labour

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opportunities to impoverished people, by giving free education to their children.

In addition

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, the illiterate community should find other ways for their pocket rather than stealing,

for instance

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, states have already initiated schemes for

labor

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labour

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jobs for unskilled proponents, so everyone can easily survive for their

breadbutter

Correct your spelling

bread butter

. After all these plans, it is the responsibility of citizens to follow the instructions and not violate the rules.

To conclude

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, after analyzing both views, it has been proven that penury and low-level education are the main reasons behind the increasing rate of crime,

however

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, it can be declined by the initiatives taken by the governments.

hkaur14165Mon Feb 17 2025

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task achievement

Try to provide more specific examples to support your points, as this will strengthen your argument and make it more convincing.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure to organize your paragraphs clearly, with each paragraph focusing on a single main idea. This helps improve the overall logical flow of your essay.

coherence and cohesion

Consider varying your vocabulary and sentence structures to enhance your writing style and make it more engaging for the reader.

task achievement

You effectively identified key causes of crime such as poverty and lack of education, which are relevant and significant issues.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay clearly has an introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame your arguments nicely.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

294 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

economic disparity
propensity
recidivism
deterrent
rehabilitative
judicial system
corruption
socioeconomic
alienation
stigmatization
decriminalization
enforcement
gentrification
preemptive measures
intervention strategies

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In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think of the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes?

Your opinion

Some people think that children who spend a lot of time reading children's story books are wasting their time which could be better used doing other more useful activities. To what extent do you agree?

In many countries people have to pay for medical care, but some think that it should be a free service provided by the government. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some people think foreign visitors should be charged more than local person when they visit the cultural and historical attractions in a country. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many companies sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some think it is a positive trend, while others think there are disadvantages. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.