Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing ( for example, cell phone tracking and security camera). In many cases, The people being monitored are unaware that this is happening. Do u think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

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In recent times the use of technology

such

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as mobile phones and security cameras is increasing to supervise individuals for what they are saying and doing without them knowing about it. In my

opinion

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opinion,

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the advantages outweigh the disadvantages as

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apply

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supervision can help to stop the malicious

activity

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before it can take

place

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in addition

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, it can

also

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help in gathering evidence remotely.

Firstly

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, It is important to address that secretly monitoring the

activity

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of people is necessary in

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this

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these

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recent times of politics and business as It can help to put a break on any illegal activities like

terrorist

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a terrorist

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attack

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attacks

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bomb

Correct word choice

or bomb

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blast

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blasts

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before they are going to take

place

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and save the world from facing

loss

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the loss

a loss

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of lives, finances,

infrastrsucture

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infrastructure

etc

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, for example,

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for example

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The famous smuggler pablo escobar was caught by the

american

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American

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army by tracking his phones and conversations.

Moreover

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, secret surveillance is

also

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very useful in gathering evidence remotely of the malicious

activity

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already

took

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taken

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place

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. It can help to identify the accused

one

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apply

show examples

and

serving

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serve

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justice to the victim

in addition

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it can be used remotely

also

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to maintain a watch on your properties or personal belongings.

for example

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, there was a robbery at

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Kalyan

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kalyan

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Kalyan

show examples

jwellers

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jewellers

jewellery

few

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a few

show examples

days back they were able to inform

police

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the police

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about all the

evidences

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evidence

pieces of evidence

shreds of evidence

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recorded in their security camera In

conclusion

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conclusion,

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the advantages outweigh the disadvantages as it can stop

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

malicious

activity

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even before it

took

Wrong verb form

takes

show examples

place

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

, if the illegal

activity

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takes

place

Use synonyms

it can help to gather the

evidences

Change the wording

evidence

pieces of evidence

shreds of evidence

show examples

and serve justice to

victim

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the victim

show examples

and punish the culprit.

nishankharwar3Wed Feb 19 2025

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task achievement

Consider providing more specific examples and elaborating on the points made in your arguments. This will add depth to your essay and make your arguments stronger.

coherence and cohesion

Improve the flow of ideas between sentences and paragraphs. Transitional phrases can help indicate connections between your points.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure your language is concise and clear. Some sentences could be simplified for better readability.

task achievement

The introduction clearly states the topic and presents your opinion which sets a good foundation for your essay.

task achievement

You successfully addressed both advantages and disadvantages, which shows a balanced view of the subject.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

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Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing ( for example, cell phone tracking and security camera). In many cases, The people being monitored are unaware that this is happening. Do u think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Student should pay the full cost for their study because university education benefit individuals rather than society. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

Describe an invention that changed people's lives. What it does (or, how it it used): How popular it is among people of different ages: And explain why (or how) you think it changed people's lives:

Some countries with long average working hours are more economically successful than their countries which do not have a long working time. To what extent do you agree?

In some places old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Dicuss both views and give your opinion.

Organized tour to remote areas and community is increasingly popular. Is it a positive or negative development for the local people and the environment?