IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

As parts of education, students should spend a period of time living in another country to learn its language and culture. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Education plays a vital role in shaping an individual. It is argued that young learners should accomplish some portion of their studies abroad to gain knowledge of cultural and linguistic aspects. I firmly agree with
this
Linking Words
 idea because it will give exposure and will enable the youth to be independent. First and foremost, studying in a foreign nation gives an edge to
students
Use synonyms
 .
This
Linking Words
 is because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 they have an opportunity to meet and greet diverse people and
thus
Linking Words
 expand their network.
Moreover
Linking Words
, taking a keen interest in learning a new language skill and adapting themselves to a novel culture makes them more flexible and hardworking. These youngsters get used to facing hardships and
overcome
Wrong verb form
overcoming
show examples
 their own fears
For instance
Linking Words
, Asian
students
Use synonyms
 moving to
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 States for professional growth has often been witnessed. They not only migrate to do higher studies but
also
Linking Words
 to get themselves integrated
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 their culture.
In addition
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
, undertaking a graduate program in a foreign country makes the
students
Use synonyms
 independent and responsible. It has been observed that
students
Use synonyms
 who travel to foreign nations learn to manage their scholastic, social and cultural
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
 better than in their own nation. Living far from family and moving out of the closed web provides them a chance to explore their innate talent and excel in it. Their horizon widens leading to good management and
decision making
Add a hyphen
decision-making
show examples
 skills.
To conclude
Linking Words
, learners should get a chance to study abroad. I concord with
this
Linking Words
 thought as it helps in good personality development by
msking
Correct your spelling
making
 them
independent
Change the adjective
independently
show examples
 and
students
Use synonyms
 learn to face the challenges in life and become confident.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Expand on the examples provided to offer more depth and clarity.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that sentences flow smoothly from one idea to the next by using more linking words and phrases.
coherence and cohesion
Be careful with minor grammatical errors and typos, which can affect the overall impression of your writing.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear agreement with the prompt and maintains a consistent position throughout.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction effectively sets the stage for the argument in the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: