Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

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Some individuals think the important reason

Change preposition

for

show examples

happiness

Use synonyms

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

Add a missing verb

is if

show examples

you have unlimited rupees.Some people accept

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

fact that everything to

buy

Wrong verb form

bought

show examples

from

money

Use synonyms

and others think

relation

Replace the word

relationships

show examples

are more important.I will discuss both questions and forthcoming paragraphs will clarify my thoughts. First and foremost,some

adolescent

Fix the agreement mistake

adolescents

show examples

adopt

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

fact that,

money

Use synonyms

is necessary for

survive

Replace the word

survival

show examples

this

Linking Words

society.if we have no penny

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

show examples

can not buy anything even though we buy

happiness

Use synonyms

from

money

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

,in

Pakistan

Add a comma

Pakistan,

show examples

a famous woman

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

name

Wrong verb form

named

show examples

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

minibar mazar

who

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

was born

Change preposition

into

show examples

a poor family but after

few

Correct article usage

a few

show examples

years she was

wealthy

Add an article

a wealthy

show examples

lady after marriage she was going

Change preposition

show examples

their honeymoon with her husband but suddenly she had saviour injured in

accident

Correct article usage

an accident

show examples

and

Correct pronoun usage

her

show examples

husband left her because her condition.Her injuries

was

Change the verb form

were

show examples

severe and every bone had struck if she

has

Wrong verb form

had

show examples

money

Use synonyms

,can not alive today because her treatment was so expensive and she had surgeries

Change preposition

show examples

her

hole

Correct your spelling

whole

show examples

body.Now she

became

Wrong verb form

has become

show examples

a motivational speaker.

Hence

Linking Words

money

Use synonyms

is crucial for specific needs and can get life with

money

Use synonyms

On the other hand

Linking Words

Fix the agreement mistake

others

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

others

show examples

other

Fix the agreement mistake

others

show examples

prefer their relation like parents,

Correct word choice

and siblings

show examples

siblings

Correct word choice

and siblings

show examples

and their small

happiness

Use synonyms

that they spread everywhere,every little thing makes us happy

such

Linking Words

as,if

anyone

Correct your spelling

any one

show examples

person

give

Change the verb form

gives

show examples

a flower

instead

Linking Words

a gold

Remove the article

gold

a bar of gold

show examples

,she

happy

Add a missing verb

is happy

show examples

with

Correct article usage

a rose

show examples

rose

Correct article usage

a rose

show examples

and her husband attention.if I looked around 3 ladies have lots

rupees

Change preposition

of rupees

show examples

fam

Correct your spelling

family

show examples

and beauty everything they have but not

happiness

Use synonyms

Lady Diana,Sajal a famous actress,

Sania

Correct word choice

and Sania

show examples

Mirza a famous tennis player

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

do not have a pure

relation

Replace the word

relationship

show examples

although

Linking Words

they achieved fame,

Use synonyms

money

Correct word choice

or money

show examples

Money

Use synonyms

is not everything and I can buy

happiness

Use synonyms

from rupees.

To conclude

Linking Words

,some

community

Fix the agreement mistake

communities

show examples

satisfied

Add a missing verb

are satisfied

show examples

with their

money

Use synonyms

and

other

Fix the agreement mistake

others

show examples

think little

happiness

Use synonyms

is most important.we should take care of our relations and provide that thing.those things will never get that hearted them .

rizbia123Sat Feb 22 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Try to organize your essay with clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to guide the reader through your ideas.

coherence and cohesion

Pay attention to grammar and punctuation, as this will help make your arguments clearer and more professional.

task achievement

Make sure to elaborate on your examples more clearly, ensuring they relate directly back to your main argument.

task achievement

Provide a more defined stance in the conclusion to summarize your points more effectively.

task achievement

You provide personal examples which can engage the reader and illustrate your points effectively.

task achievement

Your essay touches on a relevant and thought-provoking topic, which is appealing to the reader.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
47
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

289 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Financial security
Basic needs
Comfort
Luxury
Freedom
Altruistic
Philanthropy
Nurturing relationships
Fulfillment
Sense of accomplishment
Physical well-being
Spiritual beliefs
Community involvement
Gratitude
Mindfulness
Simple pleasures

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Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Your opinion

Some people believe that watching television is bad for children. Other people believe that watching television is educational for children. Which opinion do you agree with and why? Give specific details and examples in your answer.

Many university students want to learn about different subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others feel it is important to give all their time and attention to studying for their qualification. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many men and women are making the decision to have children later in life. Why is this trend occurring? What are the impacts of this development on both family and society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvatages?

In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impacts of an aging population.