Doctors often recommend regular exercise for older people; however, many elderly individuals tend to ignore this advice. What are the reasons for this behavior, and what measures can be taken to encourage older people to exercise regularly?

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Exercise plays a vital role in
healthcare
Add an article
the healthcare
show examples
of an individual.
Although
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, nowadays doctors usually
advice
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advise
show examples
elder people to stay active, they show a reluctance to
reagular
Correct your spelling
regular
exercise. There are two contributing factors
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
Linking Words
phenomenon,
such
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as they seek instant results and lack of facilities. In order to overcome
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this difficulties
Change the determiner
this difficulty
these difficulties
show examples
some
measurment
Correct your spelling
measures
can be taken, like,
increase
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increasing
show examples
the
amount
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number
show examples
of
sport
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sports
show examples
facilities
as well as
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aware
Add a missing verb
being aware
show examples
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
importance of those through public awareness. In
this
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essay, I will discuss these
reason
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reasons
show examples
and possible solutions in detail.
To begin
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with, old people usually prefer rapid outcomes but, physical activity takes time to
demostrate
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demonstrate
a
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an
show examples
improvement.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, they find it difficult to find a suitable location to perform their activities which are recommended by
Correct pronoun usage
their healt
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healt
Correct your spelling
health
advisor, to illustrate
this
Linking Words
further
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, the
experimant
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experiment
experiments
conducted by Nawaloka Hospital reveals that, by
recomending
Correct your spelling
recommending
a feasible location
along with
Linking Words
the list of activities for a group of patients, the hospital crew improve their
patients
Change to a genitive case
patient's
patients'
show examples
physical condition and they
further
Linking Words
note that that was not the case in the first place where they only provide workout schedule alone for a patient.
Thereofre
Correct your spelling
Therefore
,
this
Linking Words
illustrate
Change the verb form
illustrates
show examples
the importance of having a suitable location to perform the
assign
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assigned
show examples
task
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
their
well being
Add a hyphen
well-being
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, these factors can be tackled by, not only providing public awareness programmes but
also
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populating many leisure activity
faclilities
Correct your spelling
facilities
for public access.
This
Linking Words
enables older
pople
Correct your spelling
people
to find a spot
easliy
Correct your spelling
easily
to do their activities. For
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
instant
Replace the word
instance
show examples
, a recent survey conducted by
World
Correct article usage
the World
show examples
Health Organization reveals that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
65% of elders
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
tend to skip their daily routine
due to
Linking Words
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of knowledge of the benefits of that and they
further
Linking Words
explain that the UK government
sucessfully
Correct your spelling
successfully
reduce
Wrong verb form
reduced
show examples
their elder death rate by 5%, by encouraging public awareness
programms
Correct your spelling
programmes
programs
.
This
Linking Words
highlights the necessary action to take to overcome
this
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issue. In
conclution
Correct your spelling
conclusion
,
while
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older
Correct article usage
the older
show examples
generation
show
Change the verb form
shows
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
resistance to
perform
Wrong verb form
performing
show examples
their
acitivity
Correct your spelling
activity
schedule
due to
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lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of facilities
as well as
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high
expectation
Fix the agreement mistake
expectations
show examples
of rapid
result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
show examples
,
these
Correct pronoun usage
this
show examples
can be overcome by proper guidance and increasing the
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
number of sports
show examples
centers. All the government must take necessary actions to protect their elders and
this
Linking Words
will lead to a world where
older
Correct article usage
the older
show examples
generation can thrive from a longer life.

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coherence and cohesion
Try to improve the clarity and structure of your ideas. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and supports it with relevant details.
language use
Focus on refining your sentence structure and grammar for better readability. Correcting small grammatical inaccuracies will enhance your overall score.
task response
Ensure all your points directly respond to the task. Strengthening your examples and explanations will provide a more comprehensive response to the topic.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the topic and attempts to explore reasons and solutions, which is essential for the task.
task achievement
You have included specific examples to support your points, which adds depth to your arguments.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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