IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Enhance future lifestyle is this a negative or positive development?

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Recently, many
guadiants
Correct your spelling
gradients
guardians
give
Verb problem
put
show examples
 a lot of
pressure
Use synonyms
 to push their child
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 higher
achivement
Correct your spelling
achievement
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, they
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
 the more
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
 in
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
 attribute to accomplish
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the part. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will discuss both
pros
Correct article usage
the pros
show examples
 and cons of mothers and
father
Fix the agreement mistake
fathers
show examples
force
Wrong verb form
forcing
show examples
 kids to
achive
Correct your spelling
achieve
archive
. On the one hand, there are numerous benefits of using stress
for reaching
Change preposition
to reach
show examples
 a goal. First of foremost, some people have no motivation to study and work for good chances in later days.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they might be
putted
Verb problem
apply
show examples
stress
Wrong verb form
stressed
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 for
compeling
Correct your spelling
compelling
completing
 them to
done
Wrong verb form
do
show examples
task
Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
show examples
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, somebody who is
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
laid-back for
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
 because
it
Correct pronoun usage
there
show examples
has not
Verb problem
is no
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pressure
Use synonyms
 that they will not plan to do
for
Change preposition
to
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 succeed.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
adolescent
Fix the agreement mistake
adolescents
show examples
are received
Wrong verb form
receive
show examples
pressure
Use synonyms
 to prosper
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
also
Linking Words
 brings an overwhelming drawback. First of all, the influence of forcing may result in
emotion
Fix the agreement mistake
emotions
show examples
 that make people more
stressful
Replace the word
stressed
show examples
. After that, they can lack focus to study and
loss
Replace the word
lose
show examples
 target on the
hotizon
Correct your spelling
horizon
.
In addition
Linking Words
, there is
effect
Correct article usage
an effect
show examples
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
Correct article usage
the shotage
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shotage
Correct your spelling
shortage
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
thinking
Correct article usage
the thinking
show examples
 process. Since they get
Use synonyms
pressure
Wrong verb form
pressured
show examples
 and follow
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their
Change the word
the
show examples
 demand of
parents
Correct pronoun usage
their parents
show examples
. In conclusion,
this
Linking Words
 essay
discuss
Correct subject-verb agreement
discusses
show examples
 the
adventage
Correct your spelling
advantage
advantages
 and
disadvantage
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages
show examples
 of
push
Replace the word
pushing
show examples
 stress to their
childrean
Correct your spelling
children
. Personally, I mostly
gree
Correct your spelling
agree
show examples
 that no
pressure
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
child
Correct article usage
the child
show examples
.

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task achievement
Ensure that ideas are clearly stated and well-supported with detailed examples.
coherence and cohesion
Pay attention to the organization of paragraphs to improve flow and clarity.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt and explores both sides of the argument, which shows an understanding of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
There is an effort to present counter-arguments, which demonstrates critical thinking.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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