You want to join a new gym in your neighbourhood. Write a letter to the gym manager. In your letter ask what types of membership are available, and what the prices are ask what activities are available ask what the joining procedure is

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Dear Sir or Madam, I hope you are doing well. I am writing to express my interest

to join

Change preposition

in joining

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your newly opened gym in our locality and require some

further

Linking Words

details of

joining

Correct article usage

the joining

show examples

procedure.

Firstly

Linking Words

, as I have seen in the advertisement in the local newspaper

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

there are 3 different

kind

Change to a plural noun

kinds

show examples

of membership available at a very reasonable price and

also

Linking Words

services vary as per the type of enrollment. It was

also

Linking Words

mentioned that

significant

Correct article usage

a significant

show examples

amount of discount will

also

Linking Words

be applied

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

if we subscribe

for

Change preposition

show examples

any of the

membership

Fix the agreement mistake

memberships

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for 3 months that was something I find very interesting

Secondly

Linking Words

, I would like to enquire about the amenities that will be available with the package. So that I can choose

accordingly

Linking Words

. I often do weight training and yoga, I was wondering if there

Change the verb form

are

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such

Linking Words

classes conducted by your staff that will be

boon

Correct article usage

a boon

show examples

for me. Despite

Change preposition

apply

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that,

latest

Correct article usage

the latest

show examples

equipementsand

Correct your spelling

equipment and

restroom

Fix the agreement mistake

restrooms

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are highly

essentail

Correct your spelling

essential

for me

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

I could use

after

Correct pronoun usage

them after

show examples

my workout. At

last

Linking Words

, kindly send me details

how

Change preposition

on how

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I can get myself register to join the gym, If

online

Add an article

the online

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option is not available

then

Linking Words

Change the capitalization

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can drive down to your location for

resgistration

Correct your spelling

registration

. Please let me know when I can arrive to do so. Looking forward to hearing back from you at your earliest convenience,

Correct the word

Yours

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Your

Correct your spelling

Yours

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faithfully, Mehak

mehakpreet1618Wed Feb 26 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Try to ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea more clearly. For example, the first paragraph combines membership types and discounts which could be separated for clarity.

task achievement

Consider restructuring your sentences to improve clarity. For example, "I would like to enquire about the amenities included in the membership package," to make the query more straightforward.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure to proofread for minor errors, such as 'equipementsand' which appears to be a typo. This will enhance the professionalism of your letter.

tone

Your polite tone and formal greeting set a positive tone for the message.

task achievement

You clearly stated your interest in the gym and specified what information you are seeking, which is commendable.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

224 words

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You want to join a new gym in your neighbourhood. Write a letter to the gym manager. In your letter ask what types of membership are available, and what the prices are ask what activities are available ask what the joining procedure is

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some people think that the most practical way to become a professional is to gain practical experience in this field. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some people feel that the private lives of celebrities should not be openly shared by the media. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Today, many people aim to achieve a balance between work and other parts of their life, but few of them can achieve it. What are the problems in trying it? What measures can be taken to solve this problem?