The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying fulltime or part-time.

The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying fulltime or part-time.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying fulltime or part-time.
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The bar chart above illustrates the numbers between men and women in
further
Linking Words
education
Use synonyms
in the UK. And whether they were studying full-time or part-time.
Overall
Linking Words
, part-time
education
Use synonyms
was more famous among
both
Use synonyms
genders
whereas
Linking Words
full-time
education
Use synonyms
had a significantly lower
individuals
Correct quantifier usage
number of individuals
show examples
participating in it,
Initially
Linking Words
, in the year 1970/71 Male participation
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
part-time
education
Use synonyms
was approximately
around
Rephrase
apply
show examples
1,000,000 Male individuals, even though it dropped
Correct your spelling
slightly
slighly
Correct your spelling
slightly
in the two following decades
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it was still dominant over full-time
education
Use synonyms
,
However
Linking Words
, full-time
education
Use synonyms
remained an upward trend throughout the years,
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Women individuals enrollment in
both
Use synonyms
full-time and part-time
education
Use synonyms
was at a steady growth through all the years between 1970/71 to 1990/91. In conclusion,
both
Use synonyms
Males and Females saw a steady growth when it
comes
Wrong verb form
came
show examples
to full-time
education
Use synonyms
,
whereas
Linking Words
for Men, part-time
education
Use synonyms
enrollment figures
were
Verb problem
fluctuated
show examples
a little
fluctuated
Verb problem
apply
show examples
, unlike Females who saw a steady growth in
both
Use synonyms
full-time and part-time enrollments.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
Vocabulary: Replace the words education, both with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 3 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • full-time education
  • part-time education
  • further education
  • gender comparison
  • trend analysis
  • notable increase
  • decrease
  • consistent trend
  • educational patterns
  • substantial differences
  • preferences
  • evolve
  • societal factors
  • economic influences
  • accessibility
  • job market
  • gender roles
  • projections
  • implications
  • educational policy
  • workforce development
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