IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

.The world has seen an enormous increase in flights for leisure, business and commercial purposes around the world over recent years. what do you think are the main advantages and disadvantages of such flights. Do you think flights should be taxed more? Give reasons for your answers and include and relevant examples from your own experience.

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In recent times, there has been a huge incline seen in flights for spare time, work or international trade. Cheap tickets and frequent flights are quite common nowadays. In
this
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 essay, I shall explain both the positive and negative aspects before drawing a conclusion. The main advantage is Increasing job opportunities. Easy travel access increases the business networks around the world which indirectly increase the number of jobs for individuals. Another merit point is it reduces the cultural gaps. During their vacations,
family
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the family
a family
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 can spend their break time exploring different places and can get more knowledge of their culture, languages, lifestyles and so on. The detrimental effect of increasing air crafts is pollution. In one travel, aeroplanes create a lot of noise and air pollution that adversely affects the atmosphere and the population living near the airports. Many experts suggest that taxes should be raised to control the negative consequences.
However
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, I believe that
,
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apply
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 imposing higher taxes is not a viable solution as it only increases the burden for
public
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the public
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 to pay more rather than doing
this
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, they should try to launch eco-friendly jets.
To conclude
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, travelling by
aeroplanes
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aeroplane
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 has demerits like rising pollutants in the wind and sound but putting more taxes is not a practical solution. Cheaper and frequent flight services have facilities for people in many ways and there is a timely demand for modernization.

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Task Achievement
Your introduction is clear, but try to provide a stronger thesis statement that outlines the main points you will discuss. It helps create a clearer roadmap for the reader.
Coherence and Cohesion
While you have organized your points, you could benefit from clearer transitions between ideas to enhance flow. Consider using linking phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs more effectively.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your conclusion summarizes your points but could be more impactful. Consider restating your main argument or providing a call to action related to the topic of air travel and taxation.
Task Achievement
You have identified both advantages and disadvantages of increased flights, which addresses the task effectively and provides a balanced view.
Task Achievement
You have made a good attempt to relate the topic to real-life implications, such as job creation and cultural exchange.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • accessibility
  • connectivity
  • economic benefits
  • sustainability
  • carbon footprint
  • environmental impact
  • noise pollution
  • commercial purposes
  • tourism
  • cultural exchange
  • local economies
  • resources
  • global interaction
What to do next:
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