Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

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In recent years, an increasing number of residents with health problems are trying
alternative
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medicines and treatments
instead
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of visiting their usual
doctor
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.
However
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, in my opinion,
while
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I believe that
alternative
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methods might help a lot, I agree that visiting the
doctor
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is generally more advantageous. On the one hand,some
people
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prefer to take
alternative
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medicines without seeking any
advice
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from healthcare experts.Psychologically,
people
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assume that some minor aches or discomfort are not serious enough to warrant a visit to the
doctor
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.
For example
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,when
people
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meet with some slight pain like stomachache caused by overeating,
people
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would rather take over-the-counter medications to relieve the discomfort.
Furthermore
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,in
modern
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a modern
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and fast-paced society,free online medical consultations offer a more convenient and cost-effective option for residents.With limited time and budget,some individuals find it easier to rely on the
internet
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Internet
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for health information.They can seek for symptoms in a quick way,which saves them the trouble of booking and waiting in a
doctor
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's office.
Although
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people
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can figure out those questions through
alternative
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ways, there are
also
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some drawbacks associated with it.One main disadvantage is that the illness might deteriorate and worsen
due to
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the lack of
check-up
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check-ups
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at regular intervals.Most
of
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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diseases like high blood pressure often show no obvious symptoms in the early stages but soon develop in an unexpected tendency.Without
the
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apply
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professional
advice
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from
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doctor
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a doctor
the doctor
show examples
and regular monitoring,individuals may be unaware of the severity of their conditions and miss the best time for treatment.
On the other hand
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,the quality of online information is usually unreliable.It is difficult for individuals to verify the
advice
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given by influencers
are
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is
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accurate.
For instance
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,some false information
recommend
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recommends
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unknown medications,which lead to serious consequences,
such
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as allergic reactions or
further
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deterioration of health
condition
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conditions
show examples
. In conclusion,
while
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personal treatment may have some positive aspects, I strongly believe that
people
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should prioritize visiting a
doctor
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for regular check-ups and professional
advice
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.

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task achievement
Consider elaborating more on your personal opinion regarding the positive and negative aspects of alternative medicine throughout the essay. This will strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to include clearer topic sentences in your body paragraphs to enhance the logical flow and structure across your essay.
task achievement
You could provide a bit more specific detail or examples in your arguments to better support your main points, especially regarding the risks of alternative treatments.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay presents a clear opinion and follows a logical structure, which is essential for higher scores.
task achievement
You have made relevant points regarding the convenience of alternative methods and the potential drawbacks, demonstrating good engagement with the topic.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicines
  • treatments
  • positive development
  • negative development
  • health problems
  • usual doctor
  • access
  • personalized approach
  • holistic well-being
  • lack of regulation
  • evidence-based research
  • proper medical treatment
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