It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future, To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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There is a tale we always repeat
says
Correct pronoun usage
that says

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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"
save
Capitalize word
Save

The word save should be capitalized in this context.

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money in your white day for black da". It is important to encourage human beings especially, the youth, for the impact of savings in the
future
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. I agree that developing the habit of saving part of your income for the
future
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

a
Add a missing verb
is a

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

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priority. Analyzing how it is going to affect your
future
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and the
time
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and flexibility you will have in your
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
To begin
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

with
Add a comma
with,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase To begin with. Consider adding a comma.

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most individuals who work as an employee, should consider savings important.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, people continue to work hard throughout the whole month, just to have
the
Correct article usage
a

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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salary, that
it is
Verb problem
apply

There may be a verb use issue here.

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almost
covering
Wrong verb form
covers

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb covering. Consider changing it.

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their basic
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

needs.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is not the dream
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for everyone, and the changing point is to start saving part of your income, in order to be able to become financially
independant
Correct your spelling
independent

If you don’t want independant to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

and have
time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for other
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

purposes. Another point to consider, investing for the
future
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

provides you with many benefits.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, once you reach
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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financial
independancy
Correct your spelling
independence
independency

If you don’t want independancy to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

, either by investing your savings in stock markets or
bussinesses
Correct your spelling
businesses

If you don’t want bussinesses to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

, you will have plenty of free
time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, as money is now working for you
not
Add the comma(s)
, not

It appears that you are missing a comma or two with the negative appositive you not the opposite. Consider adding the comma(s).

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the opposite.
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, your
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

will become more flexible, and you
become
Verb problem
will be

There may be a verb use issue here.

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able to travel anywhere at any
time
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

it is
adviced
Replace the word
advised

The word adviced doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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to start saving and planning for the
future
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

as early as possible in order to live happily later on. In summary, planning for the
future
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and financial
preparing
Replace the word
preparation

The word preparing doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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for it is considered
imporant
Correct your spelling
important

If you don’t want imporant to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

, for the advantages they offer.
Thus
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it is
advicable
Correct your spelling
advisable

If you don’t want advicable to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

to do so in order to live the
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

you aimed for, and
do
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb do appears to be unnecessary here.

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not struggle as an employee for the whole of your
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.

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Task Achievement
Ensure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction and back it up with strong arguments throughout the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs to enhance the overall structure of your essay.
General
Make sure to proofread for minor spelling errors and grammatical mistakes to improve readability.
Task Achievement
You present a clear stance on the importance of saving money for the future, which aligns with the task requirement.
Task Achievement
You provide examples to support your points, such as the benefits of being financially independent and having time freedom, which enhances your argument.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial security
  • safety net
  • unforeseen circumstances
  • emergencies
  • future investments
  • retirement planning
  • financial discipline
  • habit of saving
  • amassing wealth
  • substantial fund
  • opportunity cost
  • additional income
  • inflation
  • purchasing power
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