IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

You have recently purchased a toy from an online shop, but the delivered product is faulty

Dear Sir/Madam I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to draw your attention to the
toy
Use synonyms
 which l delivered on your famous online shop. The
toy
Use synonyms
 was very small pulpy and soft.I ordered
this
Linking Words
toy
Use synonyms
 for my
nephew
Use synonyms
.When my
nephew
Use synonyms
was come
Change to the active voice
came
has come
show examples
, we wanted to order
this
Linking Words
toy
Use synonyms
 from your online shop.And my
nephew
Use synonyms
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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really wanted
this
Linking Words
toy
Use synonyms
.We
waited
Add the preposition
waited for
show examples
this
Linking Words
toy
Use synonyms
 for 5 days. My
nephew
Use synonyms
 became very upset with me when you brought to her a ridiculous monkey. We were delivered a beautiful white panda but you delivered to is a ridiculous monkey.
After
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
incident
Add a comma
incident,
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 my relatives were very upset
from
Change preposition
with
show examples
 me. I request you to
diliver
Correct your spelling
deliver
 us
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
, beautiful, and very soft panda with white wool panda in three days.
Ir
Correct your spelling
If
show examples
 you don't do
this
Linking Words
 job I will complain
over
Change preposition
about
show examples
 you and
over
Change preposition
apply
show examples
other
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
. I am looking forward to your quick action on
this
Linking Words
 matter. Yours sincerely, Zarnigor Odilovna

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task achievement
Ensure the introduction clearly states the purpose of the letter, such as asking for a replacement toy more directly.
task achievement
Provide more detail about the problem with the toy to enhance clarity and to support your request.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to check for grammatical errors and awkward phrasing to improve clarity and professionalism.
coherence and cohesion
Organize your letter into clear paragraphs, including a proper introduction, body, and conclusion to improve overall structure.
content
You expressed your feelings about the situation, which adds a personal touch to the complaint.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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