IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job. Write a letter to him/her

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Hi, I've received your letter about you needing my opinion about
wether
Correct your spelling
whether
show examples
 you should start your Bachelor's Degree or
continuing
Wrong verb form
continue
show examples
 your family's business in fashion design. Based on my personal experience of knowing you these past five years, I think you already have what it takes to start your career as
fashion
Add an article
a fashion
show examples
designer
Use synonyms
 in your family's
company
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 opinion is based on
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 things, and
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will break it down
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 you in
this
Linking Words
 letter.
First,
Linking Words
you've been sending me pictures about your sketches, and I find it not only beautiful
,
Add the word(s)
, but
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it's
Unnecessary verb
it
show examples
also
Linking Words
alignes
Correct your spelling
aligns
aligned
 well with the
company
Use synonyms
's portfolio, so having you as their
designer
Use synonyms
 is a great addition to the
designer
Use synonyms
's team.
Second,
Linking Words
while
Linking Words
 working with family will have
it's
Replace the word
its
show examples
 own
challenge
Fix the agreement mistake
challenges
show examples
, I think you and your family
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 professional enough to separate between those two, and knowing your relationship with them, I think it's going to work wonderfully between you and your parents.
Lastly
Linking Words
, it's better for the
company
Use synonyms
 if someone from the family has
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 interest
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 continuing the business. If
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 at some
point
Add a comma
point,
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 you feel like you need to study Economics or any major that can help you run the
company
Use synonyms
, it's even better, but now,
i'm
Change the capitalization
I'm
show examples
 going to tell you to go for the Fashion
Designer
Use synonyms
 spot in the
company
Use synonyms
.
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 have three pros on why you should take the spot, so
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 hope what
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 wrote finds you well and could be something you ponder on before making the decision.

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coherence and cohesion
Consider focusing more on a specific structure, such as having an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion to enhance the overall coherence of your letter.
task achievement
Make sure to properly address common spelling and grammatical inaccuracies, such as 'whether' instead of 'wethe' and 'aligns' instead of 'alignes'.
coherence and cohesion
When writing about benefits, aim for a clear presentation of each point with examples or elaboration to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
Your personal experience and knowledge of your friend's skills add a nice personal touch to the letter, making it relatable and supportive.
task achievement
You've provided clear reasons for your advice, which is essential in responding to the task appropriately.

The Closing

The style of the letter determine how you have to close it.

Check out the suggested closing sentences for each type of letter in the General IELTS Test. The closing sentence should be the last sentence of your letter.

Formal style (To someone you have not met, whose name you don’t know)

  • Yours faithfully,

Semi-formal (To someone you may or may not have met, whose last name you know)

  • Yours sincerely,

Informal (To someone you know well, whose first name you know and use)

  • Best regards,
  • Warm wishes,

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Juncture
  • Firsthand
  • Practical skills
  • Theoretical focus
  • Financial independence
  • Career advancement
  • Real-world experience
  • Part-time studies
  • Online courses
  • Financial stability
  • Career goals
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