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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some Industry leaders belive that children should learn computer programming in primary school.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

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In the era of technological advancement, many executives think that
school
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 children at the elementary level should be
computer
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 programming literate.
Although
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 globalization has made
computer
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 knowledge a necessity
due to
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 virtual assistance, I completely disagree with an opinion, because, kids that age should focus on other subjects,
such
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 as quantitative reasoning and communication skills.
This
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 essay will explore these options. On the one hand,
computer
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 programming is a key tool in many educational institutes,
due to
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 its ability to provide digital learning opportunities. With
computer
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 programming, fundamental learning
system
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systems
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 can introduce the students to the modern ways of life. A clear example of
that is
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 the famous AI app. Most students now use
this
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 application for academic purposes, namely; research and assignment, which has made learning easier and efficient by providing virtual assistance to people.
Therefore
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,
computer
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 coding and programming is essential for
school
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 children, because it provide them with the knowledge of modern technology.
On the other hand
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, these
computer
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 programming can bring distractions to the elementary
school
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 pupil, owing to their age and ability to focus.
Therefore
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, schools should focus their curriculum towards other interactive subjects that include quantitative reasoning and communication skills. Learning about these will promote their self-confidence and critical thinking.
For instance
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, organizing a debate between students and inter-
school
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 competitions can make schools interesting for the children and
this
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 often boosts their passion for
school
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. Thence, In conclusion,
while
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 learning how to program a
computer
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 is crucial, especially in recent years
due to
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 its potential in digital assistance, it is vital to note the age and interest of
school
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 pupils in terms of implementing
such
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 a syllabus.
Therefore
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, I firmly disagree with
this
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 opinion
,
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apply
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 and believe primary schools should be centred towards courses that foster critical thinking and reasoning.
However
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,
i
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I
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 think a balance between these will provide a better educational system.

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task achievement
Expand on your main points with more detailed explanations and examples to support your arguments more effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Enhance the logical flow of your paragraphs to make transitions between ideas smoother.
coherence and cohesion
Variety in sentence structure will improve overall readability and engagement.
task achievement
You have a clear stance on the topic and articulate your opinion in the introduction.
task achievement
You provide relevant examples to support your arguments, demonstrating some understanding of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
You have structured your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
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