Some people believe that international travel should be restricted to reduce the environmental impact of air travel. Others argue that travel restrictions would be detrimental to the global economy and cultural exchange. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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The burgeoning popularity of international
air
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travel
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presents a significant dilemma: its environmental consequences versus its economic and cultural benefits.
While
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some advocate for restricting
travel
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to mitigate its impact on the planet, others argue that
such
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limitations would severely hamper global progress. Both viewpoints hold merit, necessitating a nuanced consideration of the issue. Proponents of
travel
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restrictions rightly highlight the detrimental environmental impact of
air
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travel
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. Airplanes are major contributors to greenhouse gas emissions, exacerbating climate change and its associated consequences,
such
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as rising sea levels and extreme weather events.
Furthermore
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, the expanding infrastructure required to support increased
air
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travel
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– new airports, runways, and associated transportation networks –
further
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contributes to habitat destruction and resource depletion. Restricting international
travel
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,
therefore
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, could significantly reduce carbon emissions and lessen the
overall
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environmental burden of the aviation industry.
Conversely
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, the argument against
travel
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restrictions emphasizes the crucial role
air
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travel
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plays in the global economy and fostering cultural understanding. International tourism generates substantial revenue for many countries, supporting countless jobs and stimulating economic growth.
Moreover
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, unrestricted
travel
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facilitates the exchange of ideas, cultures, and perspectives, promoting understanding and cooperation between nations. Restrictions, in
this
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view, would stifle economic development and limit opportunities for meaningful intercultural dialogue, potentially fostering isolationism and hindering global progress. In my opinion, a complete ban on international
travel
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is unrealistic and ultimately unhelpful.
However
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, a more sustainable approach is necessary.
This
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involves implementing stricter regulations on the aviation industry,
such
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as incentivizing the development and adoption of more fuel-efficient aircraft and sustainable aviation fuels.
Furthermore
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, promoting responsible tourism practices, encouraging travellers to offset their carbon footprint, and investing in high-speed rail networks as an alternative to short-haul flights are vital steps. By focusing on mitigating the environmental impact through technological advancements and responsible
travel
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habits, we can balance the environmental imperative with the economic and cultural benefits of global interconnectedness.

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task achievement
The introduction effectively outlines the topic and presents the two sides of the argument clearly. However, consider adding a thesis statement that succinctly expresses your opinion on the matter, creating a clearer roadmap for the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph presents a clear main idea supported by relevant arguments. To further enhance coherence, you might want to use more linking phrases or transitional sentences between points to guide the reader smoothly through your argumentation.
task achievement
While the essay discusses both views well, incorporating specific examples or data (e.g., statistics on carbon emissions from air travel) could strengthen your argument and demonstrate a deeper engagement with the topic.
task achievement
The essay articulates a balanced view on the topic, presenting both sides effectively, which shows a fair understanding of the issue.
coherence and cohesion
The language used is generally sophisticated and varied, which enhances the overall quality of writing and keeps the reader engaged.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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