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Writing Samples
Band 7

The table and charts below give information about doctors in Australia between 1986 and 2006. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table and charts below give information about doctors in Australia between 1986 and 2006. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The tables illustrate the increase in the number of
doctors
Use synonyms
 in
Australia
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,
as well as
Linking Words
 the changes in the
percentage
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 by gender and their places of birth between 1986 and 2006.
Overall
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, the aggregate number of physicians in
Australia
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 rose dramatically; the proportion of male experts decreased continuously,
while
Linking Words
 the opposite was true for females.
In addition
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, the
quantity
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
doctors
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 born in
Australia
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 decreased over the period,
while
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 that of
doctors
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 born overseas witnessed a stable increase. In terms of the growth in the volume of
doctors
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 and the changes in sex, there were nearly 24,000 medical experts in 1986, and there was an equally increasing quantity with about 5,500 people joining
this
Linking Words
 profession per decade before reaching the number of 35,450 in 2006. In that stable increase of physicians, the
percentage
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 of men was much higher than that of women almost the whole period, at around 75% compared with about a quarter of women at the starting point. The skew was gradually smaller over the period, with the rise in the proportion of women and the descent of male experts, until the share of males was about 60% compared with 40% of females in 2006. Regarding the changes in the
percentage
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 of physicians born in
Australia
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 and overseas, the proportion of the former was about two-thirds at first and
then
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 decreased slightly after 10 years before sharply dropping to 50%, when the
percentage
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 of
doctors
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 born in
Australia
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 was equal to that of overseas.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words doctors, australia, percentage with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 4 times.
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