IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

the graph below gives information about international tourist arrivals in different parts of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

the graph below gives information about international tourist arrivals in different parts of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The graph provides
a
Correct article usage
apply
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detailed data published by the United Nations World Tourism Organization in 2008 on how many
foreigner
Change to a plural noun
foreigners
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traveled
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travelled
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 globally between 1990 and 2005. It is clearly seen that all figures representing each
region
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 experienced an upward trend over the
fifteen-years
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fifteen-year
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 period, and the
number
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 of
tourist’s
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tourists
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arrival
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arriving
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 in North
America
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 outpaced other regions.
In
Change the preposition
At
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 the beginning of the period, the
number
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 of people arriving in North
America
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 was the most significant standing at just over 70
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millions
Change to singular
million
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 before it hit a peak at 90
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millions
Change to singular
million
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 in 2000 and
then
Linking Words
 the figure declined slightly to around 87
million
Use synonyms
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period.
Followed
Wrong verb form
Following
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the
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North
America
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 was Central and Eastern Europe, the
number
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 of tourists in
this
Linking Words
region
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 was
at
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apply
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30
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millions
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million
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 in 1990 and it rose sharply to 60
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millions
Change to singular
million
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 in 1995 before continuing to grow considerably to almost 90
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millions
Change to singular
million
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 in 2005. South-East Asia was the third most visited
region
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 after North
America
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 and Central and Eastern Europe
in
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at
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 the beginning of the timeframe, the
number
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 of people visiting the
region
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 was at 20
million
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 and the
number
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 increased moderately to nearly 40
million
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 in 2000 and it kept inclining until it reached 50
million
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 in 2005. Sub-Saharan Africa and South
America
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 followed the same trend as South-East Asia. They started at the same level at less than 10
million
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 in 1990 and the
number
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 of people considering Sub-Saharan Africa as their
favorable
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favourable
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 destination grew more considerably than that of South
America
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, hitting 20
million
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 and around 15
million
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 visitors, respectively.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words region, number, america, millions, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "considerably" was used 2 times.
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