IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The diagram below shows a small local museum and its surroundings in 1957 and 2007.

The diagram below shows a small local museum and its surroundings in 1957 and 2007.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The two maps illustrate the little regional
museum
Use synonyms
 and their
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
 from 1957 to 2007 There was significant development of the
museum
Use synonyms
 over these 5 decades and ,
while
Linking Words
 the size of the small nearby was extended , the figure of trees noticeably reduced. The most notable change is the figure of trees dramatically
fall
Wrong verb form
falling
show examples
,
Linking Words
moreover
Add a comma
moreover,
show examples
 people decided
chopped
Change the verb form
to chop
show examples
 down them.The way to the
museum
Use synonyms
 was transformed to
left
Add an article
the left
show examples
 side and
instead
Linking Words
 of
entrance
Add an article
the entrance
show examples
 hall was constructed car park.The garden which, next to the road
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 removed.The trees around the
museum
Use synonyms
almost
Add a missing verb
were almost
show examples
 completely cut down and
also
Linking Words
 new
one
Fix the agreement mistake
ones
show examples
 were planted,over the decades. The size of the
museum
Use synonyms
 became substantially bigger .The previous rooms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
no longer existed or
moved
Add a missing verb
were moved
show examples
 by 2007.First of all,inside the building
were
Correct pronoun usage
there were
show examples
 3 main rooms now its 6,including
Use synonyms
museum
Correct article usage
the museum
show examples
 shop that
at
Add a missing verb
is at
show examples
 the entrance,
in
Linking Words
addition
Add the comma(s)
addition,
show examples
 was added a reception which,was between
entrance
Correct article usage
the entrance
show examples
 hall on the left side and the cafe on the right side.One of the rooms was
local
Correct article usage
the local
show examples
 history room,owners of the
museum
Use synonyms
 relocated to the centre of the construction. A new square
also
Linking Words
 was constructed for two spaces and
that
Correct pronoun usage
those
show examples
 places have taken education centre and the species exhibition,in the past it was
national
Correct article usage
a national
show examples
 history exhibition.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words museum with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • renovation
  • architectural trends
  • landscaping
  • infrastructure
  • civic development
  • cultural hub
  • heritage conservation
  • urban planning
  • visitor amenities
  • sustainability efforts
  • technological integration
  • aesthetic appeal
  • community engagement
  • accessibility improvements
  • pedestrian-friendly
What to do next:
Look at other essays: