Q; Some people think that one of the best ways to solve environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuels for cars and other vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is undeniable that
,
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apply
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issues related to
environment
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the environment
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are becoming a hindrance in empowering economic infrastructure. The notion that a convenient way to deal with
such
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difficulties is to incline the prices of fuels for every source of transportation is a viewpoint held by many. I totally disagree with
this
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notion as there are
alot
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a lot
other
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of other
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factors
besides
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difficulties
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the difficulties
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caused by
vehicles
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which are becoming harmful
for
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to
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economy
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the economy
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. To commence with, there are a number of reasons
in
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for
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believing that it is not just
means
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a means
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of transportation producing all the environmental complications.
Firstly
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, making it costly for everyone to fuel up their
vehicles
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will not only increase the inflation rate but
also
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make people against
such
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decisions which eventually will raise objections and protests.
Secondly
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, the
prolifiration
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proliferation
of
population
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the population
a population
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requires
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an
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advanced
trasporation
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transportation
system in future, and if
prices
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the prices
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of fuels will go up people will switch to public
transits
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transit
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.
Hence
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, it will become remarkably a challenging task for
government
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the government
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to render all of them with
such
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public services.
For instance
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, buses and trains will become busier and half of
the
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apply
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society will never get a chance to commute on them regularly.
On the other hand
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, issues which are more important
such
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as Global warming,
Natual
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Natural
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disasters,
water
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and water
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scarcity in various regions should get more attention.
However
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, air pollution can be solved if certain steps should be undertaken by everybody.
For example
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, banning
on
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apply
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industries which
burns
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burn
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harmful substances, burning trees and forests should be illegal and people should be insisted to use personal
vehicles
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only
while
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traveling
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travelling
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along
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apply
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with family.
Likewise
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, green
vehicles
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should offer
vechiles
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vehicles
in less price which ultimately
limit
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limits
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the use of
air polluting
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air-polluting
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transits. In my opinion, making it expensive to fuel gas can be beneficial but other measures can easily be regulated alongside for better
reprecussions
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repercussions
.
To conclude
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,
although
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providing fuel at
high
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a high
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cost will limit the number of
transporatation
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transportation
modes, it is crystal clear from
above
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the above
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testimonials that environmental problems need much more
efforts
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effort
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and regulations by everyone to conquer and
resolving
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resolve
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them.

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task achievement
Ensure all points directly address the essay question. Though you presented various ideas, linking them back to the main argument about increasing fuel costs would strengthen your response.
coherence and cohesion
Try to include a clearer progression of ideas. Adding transitional phrases could enhance logical flow between paragraphs.
task achievement
Be more precise in your examples and avoid general statements. Specific instances or studies would lend credibility to your claims.
positive
Your introduction effectively outlines your disagreement with the prompt, setting a clear direction for the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Environmental problems
  • Fossil fuels
  • Alternative energy sources
  • Renewable energy
  • Public transportation
  • Greenhouse gas emissions
  • Incentivize
  • Economic impact
  • Equity concerns
  • Sustainable infrastructure
  • Carpool
  • Commuting
  • Government revenue
  • Pollutants
  • Long-term benefits
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