IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

art should be unrestricted. DO you agree or disagree

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The problem of whether or not
art
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 should be restricted has sparked a heated debate.
While
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 some individuals argue that
art
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 may have a negative influence on society, when it has
not
Correct your spelling
no
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limitation
Fix the agreement mistake
limitations
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, I contend that frames and
standarts
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standards
 will shape imagination and
art
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loose
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lose
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 any meaning. There are several reasons, why
people
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 maintain that it is important to control
art
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 with
a
Correct article usage
the
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 main one being that scenes of
violance
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violence
, breaking of ethics and sex
root
Wrong verb form
rooted
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 in minds,
what
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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leads
Correct subject-verb agreement
lead
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 to
destruction
Add an article
the destruction
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 of society. It is essential in the modern era
,
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apply
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 because
art
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 has been becoming abstract and
diverce
Correct your spelling
divorce
diverse
divorced
 since 20 th century.
Moreover
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, today there is an increased
consume
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consumption
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on
Change preposition
of
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manifestation
Add an article
the manifestation
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 of sexuality in TV shows, movies, paintings and songs. The upshot is that modern
youngs
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young
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and
Correct word choice
apply
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adolescents rise by the products of low moral quality.
For example
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, a public survey in Moscow shows, that youngsters, who used to
cosume
Correct your spelling
consume
such
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 content have lower erudition and are interested in destructive pleasures with higher frequency. I
personaly
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personally
 believe that censorship is a way to kill
art
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.
While
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 artists are free of limitations, there will be an opportunity to develop
art
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.
why
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Why
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 is it senseless to restrict
art
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? Because it was in
the
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apply
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history.
For instance
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,
USSR
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the USSR
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 tried to censor
publications
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the publications
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 of several writers, they
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
suffered from
strict
Correct article usage
the strict
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 policy of the country.
However
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, some enthusiasts found a road to pass censorship.
From
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On
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 the other hand, violence, drugs, alcoholism and other
taboo
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taboos
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also
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 are not wrong in
art
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. Another survey in Kazakstan asked
people
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 for their favourite serials and movies.
The most
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Most
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 of them include
such
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 content, but their commentaries are that these pieces of
art
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 are very deep, and have
important
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the important
an important
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experience
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experiences
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 they got.
To sum up
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,
art
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 may have a negative effect on
people
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, who
cosume
Correct your spelling
consume
 a lot of unmoral, but
i
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I
show examples
 consider that it is unpreventable in our modern commercial, consuming world. So
art
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 can not be limited, it is a composition of imagination and impression,
while
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cesorship
Correct your spelling
censorship
 is a
barier
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barrier
 for
people
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,
whos
Correct your spelling
whose
show examples
 fantasy needs more.

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task achievement
Ensure that your position on the topic is clearly stated in the introduction and remains consistent throughout the essay. This helps the reader understand your point of view more easily.
coherence and cohesion
Consider organizing your ideas into clear paragraphs that each focus on a single main point. This will improve the overall flow and structure of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Use more varied and precise vocabulary to express your ideas. This can enhance the overall readability and impression of your writing.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to check for grammatical accuracy and spelling to improve clarity. Errors can distract readers from your message.
task achievement
You presented a relevant argument regarding artistic freedom and provided examples to support your points, which shows a good attempt to engage with the topic.
task achievement
You demonstrated an understanding of the complexities of art and censorship, which adds depth to your argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Artistic expression
  • Freedom of expression
  • Stifle innovation
  • Challenge social norms
  • Provoke discussions
  • Perspectives and interpretations
  • Censorship
  • Suppression of voices
  • Accurate representation
  • Unrestricted
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