Many people these days rely on traditional medicines instead of consulting doctors. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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Numerous individuals currently depend on alternative

medicine

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rather than consulting physicians. In my opinion, I consider

this

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a negative development that can lead to misdiagnosis and ineffectiveness.

Firstly

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, herbal

medicine

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frequently cannot provide accurate diagnosis of

diseases

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, which leads to even more health complications.

For instance

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, shamans or healers often did not have a medical background; they only operated the methods of treatment that their predecessors used. They can start treating something

that is

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not necessary because sometimes it happens that the symptoms of many

diseases

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start almost the same, but the remedy is different.

As a result

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, therapy may not be effective at all and may even cause harm to the body.

Secondly

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, traditional

medicine

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is powerless in the face of heavy illnesses

such

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as cancer, infectious

diseases

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, and chronic mental illnesses. Even conventional

medicine

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this

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day does not cope with the treatment of these

diseases

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for 100%.

Additionally

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, debilitating

diseases

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require more careful study of the origin of the disease and the use of high-tech machines for a more detailed view of the formation.

For example

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, in oncology, particularly from the first stage,

patient

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patients

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demand

for

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apply

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chemotherapy, which is a fundamental technique in cancer treatment, as a rule, complements surgery or a course of radiation therapy.

To sum up

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, I think that alternative

medicine

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can bring about negative results because of misdiagnosis and ineffectiveness.

s_syedyThu Mar 13 2025

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task achievement

Expand on the initial arguments to provide deeper insights into the negative consequences of relying on alternative medicine.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure a clearer connection between ideas for improved flow. Use transition phrases to help guide the reader between points.

task achievement

Provide additional examples or case studies to strengthen your points, particularly in illustrating the failure of traditional medicine in critical illnesses.

content

The essay effectively identifies key concerns regarding alternative medicine, particularly regarding misdiagnosis and treatment ineffectiveness.

support

Clear and relevant examples are presented, particularly in discussing cancer treatment and the necessity of modern medical practices.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

227 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cultural heritage
Natural remedies
Cost-effective
Medical skepticism
Adverse side effects
Pharmaceutical companies
Accessibility
Rural regions
Anecdotal success stories
Holistic approach
Treat the root cause
Conventional medicine
Traditional practices
Economic factors
Trust and belief systems

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Many people these days rely on traditional medicines instead of consulting doctors. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

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