IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below gives information about the number of tourists who visited five different countries between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below gives information about the number of tourists who visited five different countries between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The line graph illustrates data about
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of people who visited five different places around the world(
Brazil
Use synonyms
,
Egypt
Use synonyms
, Malaysia, France, and the USA). Over the period of time between 1995 to 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, in all four countries, there was
increase
Add an article
an increase
the increase
show examples
 in the number of tourists,
while
Linking Words
 in Malaysia there was
decrease
Correct article usage
a decrease
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. Looking in more detail, there was a dramatic increase in France between 1995 and 2000, after that throughout five years there was a slight change, but in the final year reached over 85
million
Use synonyms
.
Similarly
Linking Words
, in three countries, which are
Brazil
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,
Egypt
Use synonyms
, and USA. In both
Brazil
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 and
Egypt
Use synonyms
 were increasing over the period of time by over 10
million
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.
Also
Linking Words
, after 2005, the USA clumped about up 40
million
Use synonyms
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the number of people who travelled to Malaysia dipped. In the beginning years, it increased gradually,
however
Linking Words
, in the
last
Linking Words
 year was just under 80
million
Use synonyms
. One notable point is that after 1995 both
Brazil
Use synonyms
's and
Egypt
Use synonyms
's tourist numbers were the same.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words brazil, egypt, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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