IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The only way to improve safety of our roads is to give much stricter punishments on driving offenses. To what extent do you agree with this idea?

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In
this
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 contemporary epoch, it is crucial to attain full educational material to reach at full potential.
However
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, there are predominantly two contrasting views on choosing valuable sources of subjects. A section of society vehemently deems that practical
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
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 of learning
is
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are
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 beneficial
while
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 others believe that rendering theories have a more significant role. I opine that a substantial proportion of
both
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 methods is vital for students to acquire
overall
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 qualifications. To commence with, various factors make a section of society advocate that the practical way is better than others.
Firstly
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, acknowledging material by practising it physically will allow students to gain experience of how things happen in reality.
Secondly
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, it will not only help them identify their weaknesses but
also
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 will provide them the strategies to work on them.
For instance
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, testing chemical reactions in labs rather than studying them in books will render children the data on how reactions
workand
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work and
,
thusthus
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thus
,where to concentrate
while
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 doing them
lastly
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, practical sessions
consequently
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 empower their cognitive skills by enhancing focusing power.
On the other hand
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, some believe that theoretical ways have more pros.
According to
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 them, learning through books increases children's learning power which eventually enhances their grammar and vocabulary.
Moreover
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, there are enormous exams which only require reading and writing skills
such
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 as Ielts, Toefel and Celpip,
hence
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, can only be passed if a person has obtained adequate learning from theories and literature. In my opinion,
both
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 of the ways play a vital role in providing children with data in reality and even the way they are written and explained in books.
To conclude
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,
although
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 it is a daunting task to acquire
both
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of
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apply
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the
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apply
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methods at the same time, knowledge of
both
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 is necessary to achieve a certain level of educational proficiencies. ritikathaper1Thu Mar 13 2025 Task

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task achievement
Consider providing a clearer thesis statement in the introduction to outline your main argument effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Enhance the logical flow between paragraphs by using better transitioning phrases to strengthen the connection of ideas.
task achievement
Expand on your examples with more specific details to substantiate your arguments better.
content
You've successfully identified and discussed two opposing viewpoints on the topic, which reflects a good understanding of the subject matter.
language
The vocabulary used is varied and generally appropriate for the topic, contributing to a more engaging reading experience.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • punishment
  • driving offenses
  • road safety
  • deterrent
  • reckless driving
  • educational programs
  • law enforcement
  • consequences
  • infrastructure
  • public transportation
  • vehicle safety standards
  • substance abuse
  • traffic laws
  • dangerous driving habits
  • long-term effectiveness
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