IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

In today's world, people from rural areas are moving to
cities
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 leading decrease in the
countryside
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 population. In my opinion, it has certain problems
such
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 as overcrowded civilization in
cities
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as well as
Linking Words
 weak economy in villages.
To begin
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 with, better work opportunities and life standards attract many people from the
countryside
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 to the urban areas and it causes a densely populated society. It brings with it many problems
such
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 as traffic congestion making it difficult to commute to work, school or other important destinations.
Additionally
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, overburdened public transport makes the public more stressed and bored.
For example
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, in Azerbaijan, nearly four million out of the country's ten million citizens live in Baku.
This
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 high community density contributes to overcrowded metro stations and buses,
as well as
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 frequent traffic jams on the roads.
Additionally
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, the migration of people from rural to urban spaces weakens the rural economy. As the workforce in these regions reduces, agricultural and local industries struggle to survive.
This
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 is concerning because a nation's economic stability should not depend solely on its major
cities
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. To tackle
this
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 issue, some countries are implementing policies aimed at creating employment opportunities in the
countryside
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. In Azerbaijan,
for instance
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, government-supported funds have been established to help citizens start businesses in the surroundings.
This
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 approach is intended to reduce migration to the capital and support sustainable economic development. In conclusion, the migration from
countryside
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 places to the
cities
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 negatively affects negatively both the social life and the economic power of the state and for the purpose of preventing these issues, there should be constructive plans provided by governments.

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction and reiterate it in the conclusion to strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use linking words like 'firstly', 'on the other hand', and 'in addition' to connect your ideas better.
task achievement
Provide more examples or data to support your points, this can make your argument stronger.
content
You have identified important issues related to rural-to-urban migration, showing a good understanding of the topic.
structure
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • rural-to-urban migration
  • population shift
  • positive impact
  • negative impact
  • urbanization
  • job opportunities
  • access to education
  • access to healthcare
  • urban infrastructure
  • rural traditions
  • cultural heritage
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