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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The diagram below shows the floor plan of a public library 20 years ago and how it looks now. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows the floor plan of a public library 20 years ago and how it looks now. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The map illustrates the floor plans of Central Library and showcases the differences between 20 years ago and now.  
Overall
Linking Words
,
purposes
Correct article usage
the purposes
show examples
 of all rooms have been changed,
while
Linking Words
 the number of separate areas remained the same within
20-year
Add an article
a 20-year
the 20-year
show examples
 period. The enquiry desk for tickets or book returns on the right side of the entrance has been turned into a cafe.
Moreover
Linking Words
, on the left,
reading
Correct article usage
the reading
show examples
room
Use synonyms
 for newspapers and magazines has become
computer
Correct article usage
a computer
show examples
room
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, the door to enter
this
Linking Words
 area has been placed in front of the cafe
entrace
Correct your spelling
entrance
.  In the general area, adult non-fiction
books
Use synonyms
 have been removed and replaced by adult fiction
books
Use synonyms
as well as
Linking Words
information
Add an article
an information
show examples
 desk and three self-service machines; they are across
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
all reference
books
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
children's
Correct article usage
the children's
show examples
 fiction
books
Use synonyms
room
Use synonyms
 has switched horizontally to the far left, its size has been augmented and sofas added for storytelling events.
In addition
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
,
lecture
Correct article usage
a lecture
show examples
room
Use synonyms
 has been installed in the up-right corner of the library and its size has been diminished.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, the doors of these rooms
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 not altered.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in addition, while".
▼
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words room, books with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • floor plan
  • public library
  • layout
  • reading area
  • computer station
  • multimedia section
  • children's area
  • reference section
  • study cubicles
  • shelving units
  • digital media
  • technological advancements
  • user behavior
  • accessibility
  • traffic flow
  • modernization
  • community needs
  • conversion
  • allocation
  • removal
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