Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experiences and developing soft skill is more important. Discuss both view and give ur opinion

this

Linking Words

competitive era, some people believe university

education

Use synonyms

is a prudent way to secure a

job

Use synonyms

While

Linking Words

other

Fix the agreement mistake

others

show examples

think soft

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

and experiences are more valuable consider by employees.I personally believe that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

it all depends on

learning

Add an article

the learning

show examples

capacity of

students

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as not all

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

can

not

Rephrase

apply

show examples

achieve good grades so for them handful

Use synonyms

skills

Change preposition

of skills

show examples

are more valuable and for

others

Add a comma

others,

show examples

it might be

university

Correct article usage

a university

show examples

education

Use synonyms

Replace the punctuation

...

show examples

With

Change preposition

Without

show examples

a doubt ,

Correct article usage

a unviersity

show examples

unviersity

Correct your spelling

university

education

Use synonyms

play

Change the verb form

plays

show examples

a crucial role

to increase

Change preposition

in increasing

show examples

deep knowledge about several

sector

Change the noun form

sectors

show examples

such

Linking Words

as engineer , doctors and pilots.

Although

Linking Words

soft

skills

Use synonyms

and

Use synonyms

hand-on

Correct your spelling

hands-on

show examples

experience

Use synonyms

are necessary to get a career especially

marketing

Change preposition

in marketing

show examples

and

corporations

Fix the agreement mistake

corporation

show examples

jobs ,

sector

Fix the agreement mistake

sectors

show examples

medical

Replace the word

medicine

show examples

and

engineer

Wrong verb form

engineering

show examples

which are highly paid only

hired

Wrong verb form

hire

show examples

unviersity

Correct your spelling

university

graduaters.Because

such

Linking Words

sector require depth of knowledge and studying these subjects not only lead to high

proffesional

Correct your spelling

professional

careers but

also

Linking Words

new successful researches which potentially benefit of society well-being too .

On the other

Linking Words

hand

Use synonyms

hands on

Add a hyphen

hands-on

show examples

experience

Use synonyms

helps individuals use their

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

in real time which

cannot

Verb problem

is not

show examples

always possible by

unversities

Correct your spelling

university

graduaters

Correct your spelling

graduates

as they focus more solely on

theortical

Correct your spelling

theoretical

knowledge.

In addition

Linking Words

, high

proffesions

Correct your spelling

professionals

such

Linking Words

doctors

Change preposition

as doctors

show examples

and engineers require high and

strickt

Correct your spelling

strict

marks which may not

possible

Add a missing verb

be possible

show examples

for every student. Learning

Use synonyms

hand on

Correct your spelling

hands-on

show examples

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

and experiences could help average

students

Use synonyms

get a decent

job

Use synonyms

Change preposition

show examples

businesses

Change the noun form

business

show examples

sectors

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as marketing and sales.

Moreover

Linking Words

, many employees especially

small

Change preposition

in small

show examples

businesses do not want to spend time and money on

Change preposition

apply

show examples

trainees so having

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

experiences and

skills

Use synonyms

could easily help one in these

satutions

Correct your spelling

situations

for getting a

job

Use synonyms

. In conclusion,

Although

Linking Words

unversity

Correct your spelling

university

education

Use synonyms

is the most important factor for getting a

job

Use synonyms

high tech

Add a hyphen

high-tech

show examples

sectors

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

medicals

Replace the word

medicine

show examples

and

engineers

Wrong verb form

engineering

show examples

as it requires deep

learnings

Fix the agreement mistake

learning

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

these field

Change the determiner

this field

these fields

show examples

However

Linking Words

, in my opinion,

such

Linking Words

excellience

Correct your spelling

excellence

Add a missing verb

show examples

only possible for bright

students

Use synonyms

on the other

Linking Words

hand

Use synonyms

,for average learners ,

skills

Use synonyms

and

Correct your spelling

hands-on

show examples

hand

Use synonyms

experience

Use synonyms

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

a prudent way of getting

Use synonyms

job

Add an article

a job

the job

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

Correct article usage

the

show examples

corporation

Use synonyms

sectors

Fix the agreement mistake

sector

show examples

.A balanced approach , where

Correct article usage

a unviersity

show examples

unviersity

Correct your spelling

university

education

Use synonyms

is a suitable and best way to grab a career opportunity for excellent

students

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

handful

Correct article usage

a handful

show examples

Use synonyms

experience

Change preposition

of experience

show examples

Change the article

the

show examples

best technique for average learners to dominate others

Change preposition

show examples

businesses

Change the noun form

business

show examples

sectors

Use synonyms

amarbatth367

Mar 15, 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure to properly structure your paragraphs with clear topic sentences and supporting details. This will help improve the logical flow of your essay.

task achievement

It’s important to use accurate vocabulary and grammar to convey your ideas more clearly. Review your sentence structure to reduce inaccuracies in language use.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to support your points, especially in relation to how soft skills can benefit job seekers in specific industries.

task achievement

You have presented a balanced view by discussing both university education and practical experience, which clearly addresses the prompt.

coherence and cohesion

Your introduction outlines the main argument well, indicating a personal viewpoint which is valuable in discussion-type essays.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
65
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

354 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

theoretical knowledge
specialized skills
networking opportunities
industry professionals
practical experience
soft skills
communication
teamwork
problem-solving abilities
boot camps
vocational training
personal development
career paths
employability

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