IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The internet has become profoundly efficient and popular that people choose it as a paltform to learn. Some believe that is would eventually replace the need for books. Do you agree or disagree?

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The
internet
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 has transformed the way people access
information
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, making learning more accurate, recent, and available. Some argue that the digital revolution will eventually replace the need for
books
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.
While
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books
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 offer numerous advantages, I believe that the
Internet
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 will play a significant role in education and personal development.
Initially
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, one of the main reasons why people believe
books
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 will be replaced by the
internet
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 in terms of learning.
Books
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 offer unique benefits that the
Internet
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 cannot fully replace. Especially, reading printed
books
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 reduces distraction, unlike online sources, which often come with
such
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 advertisements. 
Thus
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, individuals tend to lose their focus
while
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 trying to learn new pieces of
information
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.
However
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, an additional reason for my stance, with the effectiveness of the
internet
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, replacing
books
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 is its efficiency. Online platforms provide a great amount of
information
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 instantly, allowing users to learn in their own interest.
Additionally
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, there are several options,
such
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 as e-
books
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 and online articles, which are often more affordable and environmentally friendly compared to printed
books
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. The interactive nature of digital learning, with videos, quizzes, and discussion forums, enhances understanding and engagement, making it an attractive alternative to traditional
books
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. In academic and literary works, undergo rigorous editing and fact-checking processes, ensuring the accuracy and credibility of
information
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 In conclusion,
while
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 the book is a powerful traditional education tool, the
internet
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remain
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remains
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 an essential source of knowledge. The two can coexist, complementing each other in different ways.
Therefore
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, it is unlikely that either
books
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 or
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Internet
Correct article usage
the Internet
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 will become obsolete, as they continue to provide valuable and reliable
supports
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support
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 to learning experiences.

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task achievement
Ensure that your arguments are clearly developed with supporting details that are fully explained. Some points could be elaborated on further for clarity.
coherence and cohesion
Try to structure your paragraphs more distinctly. For instance, make sure that each paragraph focuses on one main idea and flows smoothly to the next.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to proofread for minor grammatical errors, such as incomplete sentences and missing words, to enhance clarity throughout your essay.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a solid structure with a clear introduction and conclusion, making it easy to follow.
task achievement
You effectively presented both sides of the argument, showing your awareness of the complexity of the topic.
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