IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Memorization of information by frequent repetition (rote learning) plays a role in most education systems. Do the advantages of this method of learning outweigh its disadvantages?

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Some
people
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 argue that frequent repetition to memorize academic
informations
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information
pieces of information
show examples
 plays a role in most education systems.
While
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 that activity could consume a lot of
students
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'
time
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, it
lead
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leads
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 them to be clever and tough
students
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 academically, which, in my opinion, far outweighs any possible disadvantage. On the negative side, when
people
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 repeat their
lesson
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lessons
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 to increase
its
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their
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 academic competency, it would
consumes
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consume
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 their
time
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 and energy. They have to spare
time
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 reviewing
about
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apply
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subject
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subjects
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 that they
had
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have
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 learned.
For instance
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,
students
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 who use
this
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 method have to
involve
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be involved
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 in academic
subject
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subjects
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 again after
finished
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finishing
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 their school
time
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. They would bring
same
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the same
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 activity
in
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to
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 their home to remind their lesson.
Consequently
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, it would decrease their
liesure
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leisure
time
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 and make them potentially
stress
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stressed
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 because they could not enjoy other things.
However
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, memorization of information could be
benefit
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beneficial
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 as
students
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 would be accustomed
with
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to
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 tough
activity
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activities
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 to pursue
thier
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their
 goals.
Conversely
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, Memorization of data could be
advantage
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an advantage
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 for
students
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 as they would be
familiared
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familiar
 with tasks and responsibilities. When the challenges come, they
would
Verb problem
apply
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adapt and finish them quickly because they have
the
Correct article usage
a
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 pattern
to conclude
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its
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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.
Furthermore
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, many experts came from
people
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that
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 really have a deep understanding of their subjects which resulting positive impacts
to
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on
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 society.
For instance
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, Thomas
edison
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Edison
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 was the person that invented the lamp. He always tried to find
the
Correct article usage
a
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 way to create it and after 1000 experiments he
succeed
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succeeded
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to create
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in creating
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 the electricity lamp that
people
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used
Wrong verb form
use
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 nowadays. Repetition is the method that would make our
brain
Fix the agreement mistake
brains
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 better. It could lead us to
the
Correct article usage
a
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 great future as education would be the key and studying the lesson routinely is a good habit. In conclusion,
although
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 the method could decrease
students
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'
time
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 to do other activities, it would direct them to be smart and robust
students
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 academically, which, in my opinion, greatly outweighs any possible disadvantage.

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task achievement
Make sure to clarify your key arguments in the introduction to provide a clear roadmap for your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Try to enhance transitions between paragraphs to ensure a smoother flow of ideas.
task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples in the body paragraphs to better illustrate your points.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that there are no grammatical errors that could confuse the reader or weaken your arguments.
content
You presented both sides of the argument effectively, showing an understanding of the topic.
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