The most important aim for science should be impove people's lives. To what extent do you agree and disagree with the statement?
While
enhancing human well-being through science is important,I believe that by no means should it be solely the primary goal of scientific endeavors
. Equally important are safeguarding the environment and respecting animal rights.
In the practice of scientific studies, the improvement of human lives should never come at the cost of the environment. As the world's population increases, creating better ways to produce food, Change the spelling
endeavours
such
as more effective pesticides, becomes vital. Yet, if the focus remains solely on boosting crop yields, the pesticides developed may not only affect pests but also
make the land infertile, worsening the preexisting issue of food scarcity. This
highlights the importance of taking a balanced approach to scientific advancement that focuses on caring for both human lives and the health of the surroundings that they depend on.
Furthermore
,testing drugs on animals raises serious ethical concerns. Ensuring the safety of novel medicines for human use is critical, but prioritizing human health over animal rights is morally unacceptable. Animals ,much like humans, experience emotions and share the right to live freely and without unnecessary suffering. Subjecting them to prolonged captivity solely for testing can result in both physical and psychological suffering. As moral beings, we have a responsibility to treat animals compassionately and avoid such
acts of brutality in the name of human betterment.
In conclusion,although
improving people's lives is an important aim of science, I believe that it should never overshadow other vital objectives within the field. We must also
give equal priority to environmental preservation and animal welfare, striking a balance between scientific progress and ethics for a better world.Submitted by yuxinyun_2023 on
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Coherence & Cohesion
In terms of coherence and cohesion, the essay demonstrates a consistently logical structure. However, there could be a better connection between the main ideas and the examples provided. Consider using a wider range of cohesive devices and ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea tied back to the topic sentence.
Task Achievement
Regarding task achievement, the essay attempted to address the prompt, but it could be improved by providing more specific examples and explanations. The response should directly address the extent to which the writer agrees or disagrees with the statement, and it should be consistent throughout. The inclusion of a balanced argument is good, but the conclusion could be strengthened by clearly summarizing the extent of agreement or disagreement.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite