Employers should not be concerned about the way their employees dress at work. They should only care about the quality of their work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Bosses ought not to

worried

Add a missing verb

be worried

show examples

about what their workers wear at the office

instead

Linking Words

, they should only think

Change preposition

about

show examples

their contribution to the company. I completely agree with

this

Linking Words

statement as clothes are not a major factor

Change preposition

show examples

how a business

succeed

Correct subject-verb agreement

succeeds

show examples

Consequently

Linking Words

such

Linking Words

a condition can be helpful to improve workers' state of mind. A uniform is not a vital part of how a corporation

grow

Correct subject-verb agreement

grows

show examples

siginificantly

Correct your spelling

significantly

because there are many factors that influence

such

Linking Words

things.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, it is not necessary to make

policy

Correct article usage

a policy

show examples

on fashion as time management, honesty,

team work

Correct your spelling

teamwork

show examples

are far more valuable.

For instance

Linking Words

, The attitude of an employee shows who they really are, so it is not wise to judge them by their dress preferences.

Hence

Linking Words

, the corporation should

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

focus on the

characeristics

Correct your spelling

characteristics

of their people rather than their appearance.

As a result

Linking Words

, employees can wear anything they like as it will

affects

Wrong verb form

affect

show examples

their mood.

For example

Linking Words

, a study shows that an environment that

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

slight judgement influences

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

creativity.

Moreover

Linking Words

, people who are creative can achieve many accomplishments as they can find solutions

Change preposition

show examples

their difficulties.

In addition

Linking Words

, it is plausible for business owners to ignore their employees'

wardrobe

Fix the agreement mistake

wardrobes

show examples

such

Linking Words

a tendency will reduce several costs.

Thus

Linking Words

, it is reasonable for

company

Add an article

the company

a company

show examples

to avoid a strict rule, including the dress of folks who work for them.

To sum up

Linking Words

, clothes are not crucial in terms of business growth.

Additionally

Linking Words

, an opportunity to wear anything freely will encourage folks' performance in

workplace

Add an article

the workplace

show examples

l.cahyatriantiTue Mar 18 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Consider providing a clearer introduction where your position is explicitly stated. This helps in guiding the reader's expectations.

task achievement

Make sure to use appropriate grammar and vocabulary. Phrases such as 'worried' should be 'worry', and 'the corporation should be focus' should be 'the corporation should focus'.

task achievement

Develop your ideas further with additional examples or explanations to enhance your argument.

task achievement

Your essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear opinion, which is a good start for task achievement.

coherence and cohesion

The structure is mostly logical, and you attempt to connect your ideas, which aids coherence and cohesion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

250 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Dress code
Professional appearance
Corporate culture
Freedom of expression
Productivity
Discrimination
Inclusivity
Diversity
Industry standards
Safety regulations
Employee morale
Job satisfaction
Attire
Corporate identity
Gender identity
Cultural sensitivity
Workplace norms
Employee well-being
Business etiquette
Professional conduct

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Employers should not be concerned about the way their employees dress at work. They should only care about the quality of their work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Should standardized testing be the primary method to assess educational achievement globally?

In many countries, smoking is now illegal in public places. Many people believe that such a ban is justified. Do you agree or disagree?

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities.Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.