Employers should not be concerned about the way their employees dress at work. They should only care about the quality of their work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Bosses ought not to
worried
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be worried
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about what their workers wear at the office
instead
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, they should only think
on
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about
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their contribution to the company. I completely agree with
this
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statement as clothes are not a major factor
of
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in
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how a business
succeed
Correct subject-verb agreement
succeeds
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.
Consequently
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,
such
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a condition can be helpful to improve workers' state of mind. A uniform is not a vital part of how a corporation
grow
Correct subject-verb agreement
grows
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siginificantly
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significantly
because there are many factors that influence
such
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things.
Furthermore
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, it is not necessary to make
policy
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a policy
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on fashion as time management, honesty,
team work
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teamwork
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are far more valuable.
For instance
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, The attitude of an employee shows who they really are, so it is not wise to judge them by their dress preferences.
Hence
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, the corporation should
be
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apply
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focus on the
characeristics
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characteristics
of their people rather than their appearance.
As a result
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, employees can wear anything they like as it will
affects
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affect
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their mood.
For example
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, a study shows that an environment that
have
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has
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slight judgement influences
the
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apply
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creativity.
Moreover
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, people who are creative can achieve many accomplishments as they can find solutions
of
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to
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their difficulties.
In addition
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, it is plausible for business owners to ignore their employees'
wardrobe
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wardrobes
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as
such
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a tendency will reduce several costs.
Thus
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, it is reasonable for
company
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the company
a company
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to avoid a strict rule, including the dress of folks who work for them.
To sum up
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, clothes are not crucial in terms of business growth.
Additionally
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, an opportunity to wear anything freely will encourage folks' performance in
workplace
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the workplace
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.

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coherence and cohesion
Consider providing a clearer introduction where your position is explicitly stated. This helps in guiding the reader's expectations.
task achievement
Make sure to use appropriate grammar and vocabulary. Phrases such as 'worried' should be 'worry', and 'the corporation should be focus' should be 'the corporation should focus'.
task achievement
Develop your ideas further with additional examples or explanations to enhance your argument.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear opinion, which is a good start for task achievement.
coherence and cohesion
The structure is mostly logical, and you attempt to connect your ideas, which aids coherence and cohesion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Dress code
  • Professional appearance
  • Corporate culture
  • Freedom of expression
  • Productivity
  • Discrimination
  • Inclusivity
  • Diversity
  • Industry standards
  • Safety regulations
  • Employee morale
  • Job satisfaction
  • Attire
  • Corporate identity
  • Gender identity
  • Cultural sensitivity
  • Workplace norms
  • Employee well-being
  • Business etiquette
  • Professional conduct
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