IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of thress metals during 2014. Sumarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of thress metals during 2014. Sumarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The graph illustrates the percentage of average price
change
Use synonyms
 of three metals (
copper
Use synonyms
,
nickel
Use synonyms
, and
zinc
Use synonyms
) during 2014 on a monthly basis.
Overall
Linking Words
,
Nickel
Use synonyms
 experienced dramatic changes and showed fluctuations during the given period. Both
copper
Use synonyms
 and
zinc
Use synonyms
 saw fewer changes compared to those of
nickle
Correct your spelling
nickel
, their changes in prices varied from -1 to 3
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. The average
change
Use synonyms
 in the prices of
nickel
Use synonyms
initially
Linking Words
 stood at 6% in January, its
number
Use synonyms
 sharply dropped to 1% in March and continued declining to -3%, making
nickel
Use synonyms
 the lowest
number
Use synonyms
 of
change
Use synonyms
 in June. The
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
change
Use synonyms
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 slightly increased to -1% and remained at
this
Linking Words
 level until September before going down again and
finally
Linking Words
 rising to 1%
at the end
Linking Words
 of the year.
While
Linking Words
zinc
Use synonyms
 saw an upward trend at the beginning, its
number
Use synonyms
 gradually decreased to its lowest point at -1% in June. The figure displayed a small
change
Use synonyms
 in
3
Correct article usage
the 3
show examples
following months before surging to reach its peak at 2% in December, making
Zinc
Use synonyms
 the highest
change
Use synonyms
 and surpassing other metals.
Copper
Use synonyms
 experienced a decline until May, it was
then
Linking Words
 observed an increase in
change
Use synonyms
, staying at 1% from July to September.
Copper
Use synonyms
's
number
Use synonyms
 eventually decreased and returned to just over 1%
at the end
Linking Words
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words change, copper, nickel, zinc, number with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 10 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: